Thursday, August 24, 2006

Connectivity

Bush sunset - Chobe National Park, Botswana

As you know, every morning I meditate on the varanda as part of a ritual that involves a cup of tea and some fresh writing. Something quite amazing has happened twice now - yesterday and now this morning - and I am overwhelmed by the possibility that it's not just coincidence.

This is what my ritual looks like: I usually meditate for about 10 minutes, but sometimes it's 12 or 14. I meditate at a different time each morning, anywhere between 6:30 and 8:30 depending on what's going on that day. I sit cross-legged on a large Zimbabwean cotton pillow, with another behind my back against the wall for support. I set the alarm on my cell phone for 15 minutes out, then sip my tea for a bit before taking a deep breath and settling into my body. I try to calm my mind, phase out the chatter that seemingly never stops, concentrate on my breath and imagine that I'm connecting with the light and the air around me. My meditation session usually ends when my cell phone alarm goes off. I take a couple of deep breaths, ease off the floor, and go about the rest of my day.

A few interesting things have happened since I started meditating almost a month ago when Ricardo left Mozambique. The first is that it's gotten consistently easier to leave my mind and connect with my body and breath. The second is that each morning I get a clear vision of what color my aura is. I know, it's pretty new-agey spirit mother kind of stuff. But it's true. Every day a few minutes into my meditating, I get hit with a wave of a specific color. I see myself bathed in a light that color, see it emanating from my pores and surrounding me like a halo. Each morning it's a different color. Today it was light lemon yellow. Yesterday it was teal. The day before it was an amber color.

The third thing - and the one that has me totally floored right now - is this: Like I said before, I usually stop meditating when my alarm goes off. I make myself sit still and push through whatever is in my mind and heart until I hear the ring. But yesterday I felt called to end my meditation before the alarm went off. I stopped for a moment and considered whether or not to give myself "permission" to cut it short. It seemed right, though. I clearly sensed that it was time to stop, so I went through my usual end-of-session steps. With my eyes still closed, I took 3 very deep breaths, pushing my palms together and drawing them up the core of my body when inhaling, then separating my arms above my head and letting them float back down on the exhale. I did this 3 times, then pressed my palms over my heart center in that traditional yoga/Nia gesture. As soon as I put my palms together, my cell phone alarm went off!! I thought, "Wow, what a wild coincidence."

But then today the EXACT SAME THING HAPPENED! I felt called to end my meditation early, that is before the cell phone alarm went off. I took my 3 deep breaths, raising and lowering my arms in a circle each time, then ended with my palms pressed together in front of my chest. As soon as my hands touched, the alarm went off. I couldn't believe it!

Has anyone else had a similar experience of being able to "sense" time so accurately??

13 comments:

Deirdre said...

I think the body keeps track of time in ways we don't need to understand. My work is time dependent and so often I just "know" when the time is up. Of course, I still set timers and wouldn't dare go to sleep without and alarm. I wonder what it would be like to truly trust that inner clock?

_+*Ælitis*+_ said...

hmmm, I can't compare but I know someone that doesnt use a clock or doesnt look at the hours on the cellphone and wakes at the hour he wants/ need, he has an inner sense of time!!!

very cute what happened to you... and in life, there are no coincidences!

my internship: I can trust the guy, for real, I explained it on the earliest post.

Beijinhos!

Ali Ambrosio said...

~Deirdre - It's funny, my internal clock has reset itself in a major way since Ricardo left. I now wake up naturally at 6:30am!!! Before it was more like 8:30 or 9am. I like to trust my inner clock because I have the luxury of working from home and never being "late" for anything unless I have an early meeting.

~Elite - I'm so glad to hear that your internship offer is sincere. I read your post today and am so happy for you. Parabéns, amiga!! Você merece mesmo.

paris parfait said...

The inner clock can be reset according to what your mind tells it - so maybe it's not a coincidence. How wonderful that you're meditating every day and feeling better about everything! Gorgeous photo.

kanuthya said...

The more you meditate, the more connected you become - yes, this is a really basic stupid statement, but I guess I'm too sleepy to be writing anything else. I think what is happening to you is normal, you're becoming increasingly connected, aware, centered. I saw similar things happening to some people (I just can't bring myself to talk about my own experience argh). One of them used to meditate/relax using a recorded tape. From a certain point on, she used to sort of "black out", she couldn't really remember anything about that time frame, as if she was travelling somewhere else or sleeping, but she always, always came back at the exact moment the tape was going to end. In your case you are much more awake than she was :) Of course it's not a coincidence, our brain never ceases to amaze us, we still know so little about it. For what regards our soul, we know even less.

Bart Treuren said...

i'm glad you are finding such help in meditating, i've always known you as a sensitive and caring person and it's good to see you getting back in tune with yourself...

time is a fiction in so many ways and yet our bodies feel the progression of moments so precisely... when i'm relaxed and not pressured/stressed for whatever reason, i'm usually able to measure time on my own, without outside help... i always wake up at the right time every morning without an alarm, even though the hour of waking up varies in the course of the week, i'm still awake about 5 minutes before the time set...

in daily life, i only need to look to the sky and the clouds, see the shadows and the colours of the moment around me and can usually work out the time of day to within 10 minutes if necessary...

hope this helps, i suspect each and every one of us has some kind of built in way of keeping track of events...

keep well...

Safiya Outlines said...

When I open my eyes in the morning and I feel a little too rested and it's a little too light outside, I can sense very accurately that I've overslept!

Seeing your aura sounds very cool though.

Narrator said...

Ali, I don't meditate and all my energies are directed outward rather than inward. But I'm a wizard at waking up a second before the alarm goes off.

Ali Ambrosio said...

~Paris Parfait - I think I've definitely reset my inner clock. Now the question is: will it stay this way after Ricardo gets back?

~Kanuthya - Good point about what we know about the body/mind/soul. Your friend's experience sounds interesting, almost like she was dissociating or going into a super trance instead of just meditation. I'm definitely aware throughout...

~Bart - Amazing how we are able to anticipate an alarm clock even at a different hour. How cool that you are actually good at guessing the time from the sky and light and clouds. My guess is that I'm better at it now that I don't live in the US and work in an office with no windows...

~Safiya - Yep, I know that feeling! Only mine usually involves a panic, too. The aura thing is very cool. Wonder what color I'll be today?

~Non Vocab - I like the thought of you as a wizard at something. Seems fitting. Do you wake up at the same time every day?

Masood Ahmed said...

Internal clocks are accurate but we do not use them often.

Michelle said...

I know that I have started to wake up at 5:30 even on the weekends. Perhaps your body recognizes your discipline. I think time and body memory can work together.

Cool about the colors. I don't have stuff like that happen often, but it has, and it is an awesome experience.

kelly rae said...

there are no coincidences in life, only messages, and you are getting some strong one. keep going...

Ali Ambrosio said...

~Masd - You're right. I'm trying to use mine more often now that I've realized it's quite accurate.

~Michelle - 5:30 even on the weekends? You go, girl!

~Kelly - I agree, no coincidences. These messages are strong and I'm trying my best to pay attention to what they are trying to tell me.