1.25 Years in Retrospect

A few days ago I completed my 15-month anniversary of living in Mozambique. When I hit my 1 year mark, I didn't do much to mark the occasion in terms of reflecting on my experiences thus far. I didn't even go through this exercise when I completed my 1 year blogging anniversary. For some reason, today I felt like contemplating so I present you with a list of selected experiences I've had since moving to Africa in May 2005.

- I've been viably self-employed for over a year, although sometimes I absolutely loathe consulting and feel like a total fraud in my attempts to advise anyone about how a business should be managed or a project put together. There are days, however, that compensate for these feelings. Days where I look at a completed business plan and am filled with pride, days where I belive for a brief moment that my work and my presence here can actually make a difference.

- I've visited remote rural communities in Mozambique, visited the Eastern Highlands of Zimbabwe, gone on a luxury safari in Botswana, hiked in the world's 3rd largest canyon, and taken a bus from Maputo to Johannesburg.

- I participated in the Nia white belt intensive training in Cape Town in February and got certified as a Nia instructor. This was one of the best weeks of my life, I learned so much about my body and how it is connected to mind and spirit. I've yet to start teaching Nia, but this is certainly something I'd like to incorporate into my life in the future.

- I got a boyfriend! Ricardo also happened to be my boss at the time, but we've managed to separate our personal lives from our professional lives and make both relationships work quite well.

- I shared a house back in Chimoio with 4 other people in what was one of the hardest experiences of my entire life. Sure, all of us sharing one bathroom was tough, but what really got me was having to share my space and in the process give up control over my environment. I learned many things about myself, including that I am not a very patient person.

- I got out of said shared living arrangement and moved to Maputo with Ricardo in the nick of time for me to retain some fragments of sanity. We found a fabulous flat, adopted 2 kittens, painted the living room wall terracotta color, and are slowly creating our home. It feels great to put down some roots, and I don't plan on moving anytime soon. No, really. I think we'll still be here for another 4 years if not more.

- I've realized that slowly but surely I'm turning into my mother. I wake up earlier than any of my peers, have started meditating and reading books on conscious awareness, have let my hair go natural, and have recognized my capacity to be obsessively organized.

- I've become the world's most creative cook, using substitutes for substitutes just to be able to replicate my favorite recipes given the serious constraints we face here in terms of well-stocked supermarkets. I've also learned how to use canned ingredients in my cooking in a way that doesn't turn my stomach, although this is a skill that I'd love to abandon as soon as possible in lieu of fresh ingredients.

- I've accpeted the fact that I live in a tropical country with an agriculture-based economy and yet the variety of fresh fruits and vegetables is sadly lacking. Most of our produce here is imported from South Africa and is quite expensive. Even the carrots and onions the women sell on street corners are imported, taken out of bulk plastic produce bags and carefully laid out on colored cloths each morning. Any decent-quality fruit or veggies grown here are exported, so good quality local stuff is a rarity. Usually I can only find 1 type of local fruit or vegetable per season.

- Speaking of which, I've learned about the seasonality of many crops and feel much more connected to the food I eat (despite the restrictions metioned above). Mangoes are in December / January, Litchis are in November, Pineapples are in January, Tangerines and Oranges are in June, and Avocadoes are in April.

- I've had a friend pass away from AIDS.

- I've seen levels of poverty that make life in a favela look wonderful.

- I've seen so many groups of small children wandering alone in the streets that it doesn't really shock me anymore.

- I've gone for 3 days without a shower because the water "ran out" in our house. Really this meant that the city water department shut off the water supply, leaving people to either haul water in plastic containers from a communal tap or call the fire department to fill the water tank with their hoses, a service for which they charge $20. After enough people pay the fire department to have their tanks filled, the city turns the water supply back on and splits the cash with the fire fighters. Fuckers.

- I've successfully avoided getting Malaria, even though I don't take any preventive pills.

- I've successfully avoided getting any sort of illness, and would venture to say that I'm healthier in Africa than I ever was back in the US.

- I've become terribly cynical regarding the work of NGOs, missionaries, and any charity-related organization in Africa.

- I've seen initiatives by local people in the private sector that strengthen my belief that the answer to Africa's problems does not depend on the international community, and that in fact the aid does more to perpetuate a bad situation than it does to remedy it. The solution is in the hands of local entrepreneurs, community leaders and visionaries. This belief leads me to question the work I'm doing here and whether or not I'm unwittingly contributing to problems myself.

- I've provided money and counseling to our maid when she became pregnant with her 5th child and pleaded with me to help her get an abortion.

- I've been approached several times by prominent Mozambicans involved in corruption schemes. These are people that have strong ties to the government, work in international NGOs that have "standards" and "regulations" and "moral committments" so that this type of thing does not happen. It doesn't matter that we didn't take the bait, there are multiple others out there who will just so that they can get a contract or keep a job. The Mozambicans that approached us with corruption offers are already filthy rich, live in 3-story homes and drive 4x4s. These people are siphoning off thousands of donated dollars that are intended for the poorest, most vulnerable members of this society. Many times I've been tempted to turn these people in, but this is not the right time...

- I've helped raise over $4 million in grants and financing to support local projects. This week we are trying to get another $1 million. Sometimes concrete figures are necessary for me to realize that yes, despite my procrastinating and doubts, I have managed to do something productive in the last year and a quarter.

- I've become a member of a crafts association and put the jewelry I make up for sale for the first time in my life. It's been scary but totally worth it. People seem to like my designs, I've managed to make a small profit, I've met some cool local artists and most importantly I've found a wonderful creative outlet to balance out my life as a consultant.

- I've met all of you, the members of this amazing blogging community, and found connections with people all over the world through writing and images that help me stave off any feelings of loneliness or isolation. For this I am very grateful.

A hundred other things should be on this list but I must start working now. We have a presentation this evening and I need to start preparing my Power Point slides.