Metalsmithing Changed My Life

I feel like most of the posts I'm inspired to write these days revolve around either how metalsmithing changed my life, or how a devotion to exercise changed my life. Ha!

For my first three semesters at CCA I did nearly all my work from the studio at school. We are lucky to have an incredibly nice, well-equipped, organized, functional studio, plus working there alongside my peers was motivating and fun. The only problem was that thanks to our brutal workload, I was spending an awful lot of time away from home. Also, any time I wanted to be in studio I had to go to school, which means dealing with the terrible traffic on I-80. It also meant that it was hard to capitalize on those in-the-moment bursts of inspiration where I would give anything to get my hands on a jeweler's saw and a blowtorch. Without a proper studio space at home, those moments would come and go, hopefully registered with a sketch for follow-up at some future date.

At the beginning of 2011, I decided to start setting up a home studio. I bought a jeweler's bench and began investing in tools so that I'd have the essentials to be able to work from Casa Cali. Rico and I went to Ohmega Salvage and improvised a soldering station: a pine table meant for the kitchen (it has a wine rack at the base) that we topped with a giant slab of black marble. The only catch was that I'd have to solder outside, as there is no way to get proper ventilation in the room I use as a workspace without tearing up a wall and spending a couple thousand dollars on a proper vent system. So the soldering station lives on our covered porch, and as long as it's daylight and the weather's warm it's fine. Otherwise I just have to bundle up and move a lamp from our living room outside so that I have a bit of light. I use an acetylene-air torch and it works like a dream.

The ability to do studio work from home, especially being able to solder, really improved my quality of life. I was able to spend more time with Rico and at home in general, avoided a lot of traffic, and better managed the problem of having to drive home from school at 3am after having done an exhausting 12-hour work session in order to finish a project.

If needed, I could keep working with my current home-office-studio arrangement until I was out of school. It's manageable, and a better option than before for sure, but I've already outgrown it. I simply need more space. What I call "my room" in our house serves at least three purposes. It's where I have all my clothes and shoes and accessories, where I get ready in the morning and transition into relax time in the evening. It's the room where I have all the random things I've carried around for the past 20 years, the precious collection of stuff that's made it through Albuquerque, Maringá, Rio de Janeiro, Austin, Chimoio and Maputo, not to mention a series of storage units.

I feel like in general I am waging a war against clutter. I'm constantly revising what I own, pushing things that I no longer use, or want, or have room for, find new homes where they will be better appreciated and used. I am always striving toward minimalism, because that's when I believe I'm at my most creative (and happy?). But there are definitely things I don't want to part with, at least not yet, and those things - the extensive rock collection I started as a child, bagfuls of Anasazi pot shards collected from New Mexico over two decades, my really big and cool stamp collection (started when I was in elementary school), my seashell collection, all of my journals (which take up an entire shelf), my bag of antique scarves, a handful of good costume ingredients, textiles collected while traveling - those random things are what inhabit "my room" together with my clothes. And a huge office desk for my computer, design work and to store office supplies. And of course this is the space where I make my jewelry and do my art. My childhood double-door armoire now holds tools - a dapping punch set, a circle cutter, a tumbler, assorted gloves and respirators, sandpaper, paints, shipping supplies. Not to mention the jeweler's bench, with a flexshaft, which is a bit of a footprint for sure.

In all honesty, "my room" is just about perfect. I could live in here for the rest of my life and be happy. But the space needs to have a priority defined. Is it primarily a studio, with appropriate measures for work to be made (e.g. ventilation system, fire-resistant flooring, a blowtorch inside the house)? Or is it a living space with some limited studio potential incorporated therewith? Trying to make it both has been a good experience, but I'm aware that the room takes away from my focus and potential on a regular basis because of the insane propensity toward clutter. I try to be as organized as possible (this is likely why I am OBSESSED with organizing - you have to be really good when you are dealing with a small-ish space that needs to have multiple functions) but still there is stuff all over the place all the time. It drives me crazy.

I work so much better in a sparse space. Not that the room can't have furniture and all that other wonderful stuff, but that I need a workspace, that is the actual desk at which I'm doing my work, that is as clean and minimal as possible. There is something about having an uncluttered work desk or jeweler's bench that is magic. It's like my mind finally rests and can then be open to intense focus and inspiration.

I am in the process of moving to a new, better studio space. It is in the ground floor of my mom's new house, a few minutes away from Casa Cali. It used to be a carpenter's studio so it "feels" like a workspace, and there is a nice sunny deck outside. It is big and industrial-ish, although inside a lovely house. I can make it a real work space, incorporating a small seating area with displays where I can receive people and meet with clients and friends. But primarily it will be a studio and work-making space. I am investing in shelving that is more appropriate to my needs (what a beautiful moment when you understand what storage and organization solutions will create efficiency in your life). There will be rubber coin grip flooring and a soldering area indoors, with ventilation, and space for anvils or tree stumps or whatever else I need but don't want to put in "my room" in Casa Cali.

School starts today and I am firmly in limbo between my current space, the new studio (it still needs to be painted, have flooring installed, etc.) and the studio at CCA. A lot of my stuff is in boxes. Organized, labeled ones for sure, but not in the most convenient arrangement for me to actually use them. I still need to box up a lot of things and empty out my desks, but I think I can get everything totally packed in a matter of 3 or 4 hours. Then I will need to make the studio useable at my mom's house. That will take a while, at least a week or three I think, under the best circumstances.

Basically I am doing a mind-shift and focusing on using the studio at school right now. I will keep the soldering station set up so that in a pinch I can do most things from home. But I like having my focus on one main physical work area, it really helps me be productive. And I definitely don't like being split over several different workspaces. It is inefficient and tiring, but feasible if necessary. I just want to get everything organized, now, right away in the new studio. But school starts today, so clearly that won't happen, at least I won't plan for it.

If metalsmithing has taught me anything, it's that things take at least four times longer than you estimate in order to really do them properly, and it's always worth doing them properly the first time. Taking the time to get it right at the beginning sets you on a much better path forward. I used to live a life that relied heavily on shortcuts. I knew that what I could pull together at the last minute was usually good enough, and certainly much better than average. I could get the good grades, turn in the stellar project, give an impressive presentation without *that* much preparation and effort.

But I was also always aware, in this seemingly consequence-less land of procrastination, that I only rarely got a glimpse of my full potential. Every once in a while I'd really invest in a project or a piece of writing. Through multiple drafts, revisions, adjustments, reworks, edits...through time, really. Only then would I realize there was a different level I could be on. Not just good enough to impress the rest of the world, but good enough to impress myself.

With metalsmithing I'm not saying that I'm producing the most amazing work ever, or that I'm a superior maker. In fact I'm squarely an apprentice, aware how much there is still to learn and refine in terms of skill and design. However thanks to my new views on putting in the time and getting it right the first time, the work I have been producing is all heavily laden with my time and effort and often tears. I cry a lot about school and my work. I think a lot of the people in the program do. I wonder if this ever goes away as you become more seasoned.

Anyhow, there is an incredible amount of emotional and physical energy in each piece, even the ones that are just little one-week projects. I've never worked so hard on so many things for such an extended period. No wonder I'm always having a mini-crisis! But honestly, I can see how my work is now an a different level, even though I'm still a learner. I continually impress myself with what I'm able to create, how much work I can bear and still be happy. I would never have pushed myself this hard if it weren't for school. I wonder now if that momentum will continue to carry me through my work once I graduate and am no longer in that amazing bubble where your work is everything and everything is your work.

I would imagine that someone more experienced would say that it's a shift in perspective that will allow you to continue to push yourself beyond what you think is possible on a regular basis. That you understand at some point it wasn't the school structure or critiques or social environment or even the grades or the accountability that made you work so hard. It was something inside you, that you can always access, that pushed you to be your best. That you must arrange your life so that it fosters this inside space.

And thus all the thoughts about organization. It all comes full circle, of course. I know that clutter is one of the main ways for me to dampen the magic, so that is why I am on a never-ending quest to be as organized, efficient and systematic as possible. I often feel very old and uncool harping on about the glorious potential of organization and discipline and fitness to change your life. But really, that's what I have to share about the last few years. The conclusion is clear to me, so I will keep talking and hopefully the fact that this all comes from a very honest and humble place will keep me from being too annoying. :)

Things I Learned About Myself in 2011

A slightly late, slightly incomplete recap of things I realized in 2011.

• I wear a lot of pink. I never though of myself as one of those girls who is obsessed with pink, but my friends at school started pointing out all the places there is pink in my life and I had a moment of truth. My favorite cardigan is mauvey-blush. My second-favorite cardigan is fuschia. My wallet is bright pink ostrich skin from South Africa. My fingerless gloves that I wear constantly are an antiquey rose. My Moleskine agenda was orchid pink. I love to use tourmalines and rubies in my jewelry. And on, and on, and on.
• My fear of parallel parking was totally rooted in not knowing how to do it properly. I never learned in driver's ed back in the day, never lived in a city where parallel parking was necessary, and when I finally had to do it on a frequent basis in Maputo there was always someone around (building guard, parking attendant, etc.) to guide me in at the right angle. Last year I finally learned how to parallel park. I still get nervous, but at least I know what to do to correct a bad start. Before I was just blindly turning the wheel and hoping for the best. I'm amazed I never did any serious damage. :)
• I love to run. I am addicted to running. I will make running a priority no matter how busy I get with school. I sign up for races and wake up before sunrise to get to the start line. I run in the rain. I run when I'm tired. Running is my miracle cure-all, together with dancing, but I'd always enjoyed dancing whereas running was possibly my #1 most dreaded and despised activity as a child and for most of my adult life. But now I've seen the light, and I doubt I'll ever stop. I'm at the point now where I unabashedly refer to myself as a Runner.
• The BPM dance music station on Sirius XM is a godsend. Twenty minutes in the car with it at full volume will infuse me with energy and put me in an amazing mood. I have a little dance party in the car every single day. I'm sure I look a little ridiculous, but I don't care.
• I learned a lot about how to dress for my body type last year. This may seem trivial to some, but I adore figuring out what looks good on me and what styles I should avoid come hell or high water (ahem. cropped pants, anyone?). I have a super long torso and short little legs. I am also blessed in the big-ol' hips/thighs department, have a tiny waist, and broad shoulders. 2011 was the year that I discovered dolman sleeves and horizontal stripes look really flattering on me (as long as the waist of the top is fitted at my waist), as do shorts over similar-colored tights. Who'd have thought... I also came to terms with the fact that I will never, ever look good in skinny jeans no matter how skinny and fit I may be. Ditto for crops or cuffed pants. I also bit the bullet and got rid of most of my dresses and skirts that hit mid-calf because my lifestyle doesn't really involve high heels anymore and they are absolutely necessary to pull off that otherwise dowdy, stump-ifying length.
• I also got rid of nearly all of my black clothes. Yes, black is classic and elegant, but it just seems too harsh for me. I wear black and feel like I'm in costume, as if I were wearing things out of someone else's wardrobe that are clearly not "me". I still wear black to work out, but somehow that's different.
• 2011 was a year in which I let go of a lot of obligations. Specifically I gave myself permission to sever ties with some people I didn't want to have a relationship with, be it unfriending someone on facebook, or just putting significantly less effort into the friendships/family ties that added a negative tone to my life. It felt good. I have no regrets.
• I fully owned the fact that I am compulsive, hyper-organized, competitive, type A and all that jazz. I have control and trust issues. I am known to freak out if my jewelry supplies are messy or the kitchen cabinets aren't organized according to optimum functionality. I feel soothed when I write my schedule in my paper agenda. My favorite thing ever is to write in engagements and doctor's appointments and dance classes for the whole semester or even the year. I like to do my taxes (and I do them on paper!) and find the whole exercise very comforting. I spend much of my free time organizing drawers or my closet or color-coordinating labels in my sketchbook. What's really funny is that because my mom is the most organized person on the face of the earth, I spent most of my life thinking I was a messy, laid back, non-compulsive person because I had her as my example of what it meant to be the opposite. In Mozambique, I started to get a hint at my true colors when, under extreme stress in Chimoio, my default reaction would be to fold and organize my clothes and rearrange things in the pantry according to size and shape. But it took me going to art school to really understand what a compulsive, organized person I really am. :)
• I'm also increasingly aware of how hard it is for me to be on vacation and relax. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love to do nothing. Few things top a lazy weekend at home with cats and trash tv and sunbathing. But something happens when I'm officially on break. It's like a switch flips and I become a basket case. Having all that free time freaks me out. I don't know what to do with myself, yet I become hyper-aware of all the pending items on my to-do list, of my unmet goals, of the 1,001 things I should or could be doing. I never feel productive enough, yet often am so tired and in desperate need of a break that I can't bring myself to get things done. I think I've become used to the crazy rhythm of school. Life seems normal and I am happy when I have too much on my plate, it seems. Something about the constant get-up-and-go is better than the inertia that results when I step off the wild ride. Go figure...
• 2011 was a tough year in that I've never worked so hard, but things are starting to come together. What makes it possible is that I have an amazing support base. Rico is, in a word, amazing. I often joke that I hit the husband lottery. My core family is loving and encouraging and kind. The cats are fat and happy. I have good friends. I am in better shape than I've ever been in my entire life. I feel determined, aware of what I want to accomplish going forward, content to work myself to near exhaustion during this period of apprenticeship.

Roomba Ran Over a Cat Turd

Yes, sadly, that happened. The how's and why's are still unclear, and honestly I'm fine with that. The fact that we had a rogue cat turd lying around somewhere for the robot vacuum to discover is knowledge enough.

After many Q-tips, half a bottle of Lysol, and enough swearing to make our bad-ass Coast Guard neighbor blush, Roomba is clean again. Rico now has infinite credits in the gross-household-jobs bank.

And we've got our eye on those cats.

Classification Fever

I am incapable of passing an unfamiliar tree, fruit, vegetable or animal without feeling a desperate need to identify it. Languages, too. Hearing people speak some strange tounge makes me go crazy. I want to know what it is, where they are from.

I keep a running mental tally of things I need to google. The latest searches have been prompted by the caimans that hang out in the canal down the street from my m-i-l's house (jacaré do papo amarelo), the medium-sized rodents I spotted in the bushes while on a run yesterday (pretty sure they are cotias), and the tree full of mango-like yellow fruits I saw while eating lunch in Santa Teresa this afternoon (cajás).

I remember frantically trying to identify the caterpillar that stung Rico a few years ago while cleaning vines out of the pitanga tree (tropical relative of the io moth caterpillar), not to mention the myriad snakes spotted along the roadside in Mozambique (forest cobra, puff adder, and what I'm nearly positive was a black mamba).

When I'm able to make a classification it gives me such great satisfaction. Like all is well in the world because I strung together the magic combination of key words to find the beast or fruit I so desired to identify on the internet.

On My Mind

- I'm annoyed because I have a pretty bad blister on my left ankle. I got it thanks to what I'd hoped would be a comfortable, cute pair of sneakers. Instead, they tore up my feet in less than 10 minutes. I wonder if an 8 would be any better (I wavered between buying 7.5 or 8 in the shop). I love the mustard color so much I would be willing to break them in, but I want to do the least amount of suffering possible.

- I worked out with my personal trainer and then went for a run with my friend E. this afternoon. Recently I made the leap from doing intervals of running/walking to just straight jogging with no breaks. It is quite exciting. We go running around Lake Merritt which is 3.1 miles, and usually can do one loop around without stopping. Not today, however. My blister got in the way and crippled me about 3/4 of the way through. I was really frustrated, but some run is better than no run.

- My week in Mendocino was life-changing. It's the first time I've felt truly validated as an artist, and I had a really good time teaching as well. I was the studio assistant for a chasing and repoussé workshop taught by a total master. He's one of these people who seems to deliberately avoid an online presence, so I won't call him out here. He's amazing, though. I felt like I was taking a workshop from Morgan Freeman in his role as God.

- The Mendocino trip was good because I feel it centered me, helped me put things into perspective. I will need to draw on this for the next four weeks.

- Rico and I are going to Brazil on Thursday. It will be a great trip for many reasons, but it will also be an emotionally and physically exhausting one. We are selling Casa Rosa, and need to clear out all the furniture and see what we want to ship back here. We need to find a place for the woman who looks out for the house to live, and a way to get her a monthly stipend since she doesn't qualify for social security yet and has health issues that prevent her from continuing to work. We need to say goodbye to the house, which will be heart-wrenching for me, but in the big scheme of things what I recognize is the best way forward. I anticipate coming back from Brazil feeling very, very, very drained. I hope that's not the case, but if I learned anything in Mozambique it's to start with low expectations and go from there.

- I wish I were a bit tanner and a bit thinner prior to going down to Rio.

- I also wish I had more time to be in studio, as I'm just dying to work but don't really have time to finish anything (or really even get started) before we fly South.

- Hazy, the neighbor's cat who adopted our house for a brief period some months ago, came back for a visit. I was in the garden picking strawberries when he appeared by my side, seemingly out of nowhere. We were so happy to see each other. I really love this cat, even though he's not ours. When we first met him, we thought he was a stray and even took him to the vet to have his microchip scanned. That's how we found out Hazy belonged to our neighbors. About a month ago they moved to Hawaii and didn't take the cat. He's now being taken care of by another neighbor, but I think he's meant to be ours and that's why he keeps coming back and being so loving. He's such a beautiful boy, a soft gray tabby who is endlessly friendly and playful. He reminds me of Parceiro.

Versatile (7 Random Things)

I´ve decided to play along after seeing Gem´s great responses. This is the Versatile Blogger award, and I´m tagging you all to share 7 random facts with the virtual world. Here are mine:

1. I am fairly certain I qualify as someone who suffers from OCD, but have never done anything about it (i.e. therapy) because my life isn´t made unmanageable by my funny little habits. One of my compulsions is with numbers - in particular the number 13. I am especially satisfied when there are 3 sets of 13. For example, if I am cooking and know that the veggies I´m stir-frying (or whatever) need just a bit more time to be perfectly done, I start counting in sets of 13. I either have to do 3 or 9 repetitions to feel like all is right in the world. Sometimes I´ve burned my food because I don´t want to stop at 2 sets of 13, or God forbid at the number 8 or some other unacceptable integer. That said, I can usually make my desire to have a perfectly cooked meal override my compulsive counting patterns. Other ways in which counting to 13 appears in my life: prior to diving into a pool or the ocean, while annealing a piece of metal, while running (I count my steps), and while trying to fall asleep.

2. I like dogs, but can´t stand the way they smell or to be licked by them. I also have a healthy fear of big dogs, at least until I get to know them well enough to trust they won´t jump on me or try to bite.

3. I am the fastest typer you will ever come across. I think I could set a Guinness Record, if such a category existed. (Maybe it does...who knows, this could be my ticket to fame!) I type so fast that I score off the chart of every words-per-minute software I´ve ever used. I´m definitely over 80 wpm, and am super accurate. I also hit the keys - in particular the space bar - with such force that I eventually rub the letters off the keyboard and leave burnished, shiny marks in their place. I can also hold conversations with people while I type and it doesn´t really affect my speed or precision, or my ability to make sense while I talk. Rico often makes fun of me and will randomly tap his fingers lightning-fast on a table, suggesting that I´m just typing gobbeldy-gook instead of real words. I think part of my typing speed is due to the fact that I played classical piano for 15+ years and developed super power muscle memory in my fingers. If all else fails, I´d make a damn good court reporter.

4. I´ve never baby-sat in my entire life. I don´t particularly feel comfortable around babies or kids, although I believe I´d like to have a family at some point.

5. I am somewhat obsessed with almond-flavored desserts. Marzipan, almond paste, almond extract - I love them all. Once my friend Marlen gave me a giant tube of marzipan as a gift and I ate the entire thing pure in just 2 days. The most delicious dessert I´ve ever eaten is an almond frangipani tart with nectarines from a bakery in Berkeley called La Farine. My mouth is watering just thinking about it!

6. I have issues sharing utensils, glasses and food with other people. I´m totally grossed out by the idea of ingesting someone else´s residual saliva. It´s to the point that I´ll willingly give up whatever I was eating or drinking and let the other person finish it, rather than take it back and think about how I´m consuming their spit. I can override this instinct if necessary (to save face in social situations) but it takes a big mental effort on my part. I hope never to be offered chicha if I ever visit Peru. I think it would make me vomit.

7. I have problems regulating my body temperature. 99% of the time, I feel cold and have a really hard time warming up, even while wearing wool socks and a sweater, and sitting under layers of blankets. My hands and feet are usually like blocks of ice, and they often go numb and lose all circulation (I have Reynaud´s Syndrome). However, even if I have white digits and am trembling with cold, my body - in particular my core - radiates heat. It´s especially pronounced at night, when seemingly a switch flips and I go into nuclear reactor mode. I give off insane amounts of heat while sleeping and when relaxed, and yet all the while feel cold. Go figure...

Funny

My Facebook status from a few days ago:

"Ali la Loca just took a big, greedy, excited bite out of what she swore was a chocolate bon-bon...only to discover it was a fucking artisanal piece of soap."

Someone gave my mother-in-law a pretty little basket full of what looked to be white and milk chocolate bon-bons. For some reason, she thought they were stones. Both Rico and I were convinced they were chocolates. To prove my point, I took a big ol' bite out of one of the 'bon-bons'...and immediately realized that all of us had it wrong. I spent the rest of the day with very clean teeth and a disgusting, perfumey taste in my mouth. Lesson learned: smell before you bite.

Busy Bee

In the last week:

- A whirlwind trip to New Mexico, including a night in Santa Fe to celebrate our 2-year anniversary.

- My first gallery opening in California. A success, but as always a tremendous and inevitably underestimated amount of work to get ready for a show.

- Seemingly endless product photography, photo editing, cost calculating, spreadsheet updating.

- A very tedious translation on Mozambique's land policy.

- A house guest, a friend back from my days living in Austin.

- World Cup!

- An overgrown, thirsty garden desperately needing to be weeded.

- Cooking a delicious, collaboratively prepared meal of bbq pork tenderloin, arugula salad from the garden, homemade applesauce also from the garden, Cuban rice and beans.

- Sleep deprivation.

...and the list goes on. I need a holiday!

Today Was One of Those Days

It all started when I was reading the paper this morning. There was a cutesie little feature on "quotes from dads" submitted by readers.

SHIT, I thought, not again*.

I'd forgotten Father's Day. Or so I thought for about 20 minutes until I frantically went on Amazon.com to pick out a present for overnight shipment, debating whether to cook up an excuse or just be straight and admit I'd forgotten, and saw a page full of grills and gadgets and geeky stuff perfect for Dad.

It's next Sunday. Sigh of relief. My present's already in the mail.

Then I got ready for a nice, productive day all by myself here at Casa Cali. Rico and my mom had an all-day meeting, so I was looking forward to organizing my office, making some jewelry, doing laundry and catching up on emails. We only have one car, so I was ready to spend the whole day at home.

It was too good to be true, though. I soon discovered I'd spaced a workout session with my trainer at 4pm - all the way in Oakland. And I had no car.

Thankfully my mom lives about a 30-minute walk from our house. I managed to email her in the middle of their meeting and get permission to use her car. I'd have to go on an unexpected walk, but I thought I'd solved my logistical problem...until I remembered that I HAD NO DRIVER'S LICENSE. It had stayed in Rico's wallet after our jaunt to the local bar yesterday to watch the World Cup game.

Shit. Again.

Still, I thought I'd go ahead and risk it. I walked to my mom's house, got her spare key, found her car in the building's garage, and promptly hit another obstacle. I couldn't figure out how to get the damn garage gate open from the inside without the clicker. My mom had said there was a box where you could use the key to open the door, but I couldn't find it anywhere.

I went in search of the maintenance man to help me, but he was nowhere to be found. I finally had to ask some random couple walking their dog if they could show me how to open the garage door from the inside. I tried to put on my most innocent, "I'm not trying to steal anything or break in" face possible.

The stupid key box turned out to be about the size of a walnut and was hidden all the way in the darkest corner of the parking garage. I never would have found it without that neighbor.

So then, after all the car and garage drama, I was finally with vehicle and on my way to the studio in Oakland to work out, praying for no cops along the way.

Upon arrival, my trainer - who is never, ever, ever late - wasn't there. Turns out she didn't have me in her schedule. I managed to work out with another trainer who was free at that time, but still, I felt so crazy.

I NEVER have days like this, where everything seemingly goes wrong, or at least deviates significantly from the plan. Sometimes I have a little scheduling hiccup, or forget about a doctor's appointment...but a whole sequence of stuff is rare. It sort of knocked me off kilter, so I'm doing what any sane girl would do at the end of a day like this:

BATH + WINE + TRASH TV.


* Last year I forgot my Dad's birthday, and couldn't believe I'd make a similar mistake two years in a row.

Summer Plans

On my master to-do list for Summer 2010:

• finish production for Fiesta jewelry collection
• photograph and list new jewelry on my website
• do a photography session with models wearing my jewelry
• create a small ad campaign targeting jewelry clients in Mozambique
• lots and lots of gardening
• plant some squash
• make blackberry jam with the berries from our garden
• paint Rico/my mom's home office a nice steel blue
• paint the tv room a dark amber-ish color
• rip out carpet downstairs and install new wood flooring (together with Rico, obviously)
• have a brazilian bbq
• finish the drawing of my rehearsal dinner dress
• organize my art supplies
• get a better filing system for all of my papers
• formalize my translation business
• continue typing up my old journals
• hang our hammock in the backyard
• organize and print photos from our time in Mozambique
• go hiking on a new trail
• have an almond dessert party
• get a massage
• go to a friend's wedding in Houston
• go to our cousin's wedding in Rio

Sounds like fun, no?

La Vida Expatica #2: The Things We Take With Us

Dear fellow expats (and serial in-country relocators),

When you are an expert at packing up and moving all of your worldly posessions at least once every two years, you become awfully practical about what to keep and what to leave behind (as discussed here).

However, we are all sentimental beings and occasionally a not-so-practical item will squeeze its way into the mix. You know what I'm talking about: those special little (or not so little!) objects that remind us of home, of family, of friends, or even of a particular cuisine or lifestyle. We carry them with us in hopes that geographical distance won't be the end of our fond memories and personal bonds.

Sometimes these mementos are easy to fit in a suitcase or pack into a cargo box: old photographs, a cookbook, a jewelry box, a satchel of lavender from a garden past. Other times, our sentimental objects are oversized, impractical, heavy as all hell, and prone to cause problems at customs.

On my personal list of the wholly absurd (but emotinally satisfying) things I've hauled halfway around the world and back, the following stand out:

- a complete set of antique silver flatware;
- all of my jewelry-making supplies (#1 in creating headaches at customs);
- all of my old journals (20 volumes, to be exact)
- countless cans of green chile (although as a New Mexican, this is really an essential and not a luxury).

What about you? I'd love to know the most random things you've repeatedly packed up and carried with you over the years. What are the objects you can't imagine leaving behind? Please share in the comments!

Another Reason to Call Me 'La Loca'

I love doing my taxes.

Regardless of whether I am entitled to a refund or have to fork over some of my hard-earned money, I take great pleasure in the process of filling out my tax return. I like all the calculations, the challenge of having to understand the word-problem-esque nature of some of the line items, the satisfaction of having everything nice and tidy and accounted for at the end of the day.

I realize I am in the minority on this one, for sure.

Doing my taxes falls into the same highly satisfying category as other (generally-hated) tasks such as filling out forms (census, doctor's office, school applications), maintaining a detailed spreadsheet of my business revenues and expenses, and balancing my checkbook (back in the day before internet banking when I actually still bothered to do that).

I also love jigsaw puzzles - the really hard kind, with a monochrome pattern and 1,000 tiny pieces. In my crazy head, all of these things are members of the same family.

Time for Some Housecleaning...

...the literal kind. My home-office has looked a bit as if a hurricane swept through for the last couple of weeks and it's driving me crazy. I feel the urge to clean and organize no matter what, especially because I have to study for midterms this weekend and I am incapable of really concentrating when my environment is messy.

I've got a cold beer open and salsa/afro-pop/carnaval music on shuffle, so I suppose that means it's time to get going.

At This Moment...

Listening to Kings of Leon on the radio, via our Sonos sound system. I'm so grateful that Rico is into technology, otherwise I'd have never discovered this great music solution.

Drinking a nice red Zinfandel, the perfect companion to the cool temperatures and the rain pounding outside. I thought the sun was here definitively for the summer, but apparently that was wishful thinking. :)

Smelling piñon incense, my absolute favorite New Mexico scent.

Wondering why it always seems to rain on the days I have drawing class (and therefore have to lug around a giant easel full of paper while riding BART and walking the 8 blocks to school).

Wishing it were already spring break. I am starting to feel a bit burned out...but in a good way.

Avoiding working on my latest translation job for the World Bank. I've told myself that I will blog, then get to work.

Feeling the soreness in my hips and lower back from my workout yesterday. I am doing one personal training session per week, and my trainer Lisa totally kicks my ass...again, in a good way.

Dreaming about sunshine, cocktails on the beach, getting tan. Good thing we are going to Brazil in August for our cousin's wedding - I've already been told by several people that summer in the Bay may not meet my seasonal expectations given that I've been living the tropical, humid life for the last 8 years or so.

:)

The Biggest Difference

People frequently ask me and Rico what the biggest difference is between life in Maputo and life in Cali. They want to know how the transition has been, if we've experienced wicked culture shock, if we are feeling like foreigners in a foreign land.

To be honest, the culture shock thus far has been minimal. The changes are obvious - we are talking about two very different places and lifestyles, of course - but coping with said changes hasn't been traumatic at all. What we most miss about life in Mozambique is our friends, full stop. The rest is incidental.

However, this evening Rico had a eureka moment. There is one really big difference that impacts our lives and the way we interact with friends, family and the rest of the world on a daily basis.

Any guesses?

I won't be dramatic. :)

The big innovation is that WE CAN RELIABLY SEND AND RECEIVE MAIL. Such a simple thing, but with such a huge impact. Being able to depend on the postal system (and not be at the mercy of terribly overpriced couriers) has made it possible for me to order gemstones and other jewelry supplies online, make custom designs for my customers and ship them within a few days, set up a website with e-commerce capabilites, send Christmas gifts to everyone in the family on time, send letters to friends, fill out and return assorted paperwork, subscribe to Vogue and other magazines, order shoes online and return them immediately if they don't fit, receive and recycle junk mail, pay bills by check, print photos online, order books from Amazon.com...and so much more.

I can't believe this didn't dawn on us earlier.

Winter Senses

Listening: to Wyclef Jean's Carnival, Vol. II - Memoirs of an Immigrant. This is one of the best albums I've ever heard. I have a feeling this is going to be on repeat until Rico and I know all the words. Definitely worth the purchase on iTunes.

Watching: Nina sleeping on a pile of my (no longer) clean clothes. She is the sweetest little cat. She follows me around the house all day, just waiting for a bit of carinho.

Drinking: a Miller Genuine Draft. Not particularly glamorous, but you take what you get when it's raining outside and you can't be bothered to run to the store.

Admiring: my mother-in-law who embarked on a lifestyle change and has lost 20kg since July thanks to aqua aerobics and a healthy diet.

Smelling: my favorite incense in the world (and a big part of what helps me feel the holiday spirit) - Piñon incense from Inciensos de Santa Fe. This smell = New Mexico winter.

Wondering: if the upgrade to QuickBooks Premier will meet my needs. I originally got Pro, but it doesn't allow me to do the raw materials and finished product management that I currently do using Excel spreadsheets. I need the "assembly" function of the Premier version, it seems, to be able to manage my constantly shifting inventory and one-of-a-kind finished jewelry.

Feeling: grateful that the effects of the delicious-but-too-rich-for-my-system smoked salmon served at Christmas dinner last night have passed.

Planning: my business goals for 2010.

Wishing: I could go shopping. I recently had a style consult which involved having my colors done and I'm itching to buy clothes. It's not at the top of the old priority list in terms of how to allocate my financial resources, but a giant shopping spree would be so much fun. :)

What Is the Obsession with Pomegranate?

I mean, seriously! Why is every last thing from fabric softener to "flameless luminary" faux candle air fresheners to hand creme scented with pomegranate these days? And don't get me started on all the granola bars and juices that are pomegranate-flavored. I get all the health benefits of pomegranate, but this seems like a overload.

I remember a few years ago when the big thing was cranberry. What's next, I wonder. Fig? Satsuma? Passion fruit? We all know that açai is already on the horizon (as a weight loss supplement, no less!) so I suppose that's off the trendy list...

In other news, my mind is slowly being corrupted by commercials. Rico and I watch at least one episode of Law & Order and one of Criminal Minds each night - it's our favorite way to relax at the end of a work day - and the commercials during these shows are just terrible. They are also lamentably effective. For the last two days, the Geico commercial with the talking pothole has been stuck in my head. I have a talent for imitating accents, and I can do the ditzy Southern, "Oh, naaaaaaaaaaaoe!" spot on. "Hawld on, lemme get mah ce-lyoo-lur, call ya a wreckur." Please tell me you know the commercial I'm talking about. I did it on the phone for my friend Jenny in Moz the other day, and I think she thought I was losing it. Still, I laugh every time I see the stupid thing on tv.

Other top commercials on the mind: the whole "Love Stinks" series by Swiffer, Geico again with the Russian thug pipes the car backs into, and a top contender for my favorite ad on tv at the moment, the Mucinex animated mucus guy that dances at the Cough-a-Cabana, invites all his animated mucus relatives for the family reunion, and protests, "Twelve aowahs!" at the purported duration of the medicine.

Yes, mush. My brain is turning to mush. I should be filling my mind with QuickBooks and taxpayer id#'s and brilliant ideas for how on earth I'm going to manage being at 8am classes for the next 3 years...come to think of it, it's not surprising I want to watch trash at the end of each night. ;)

How Have I Changed? (the superficial version)

How have I changed since moving to Mozambique? Significantly, I imagine. I get glimpses of the magnitude when I go home, when I visit old friends, when I am reunited with old stomping grounds and memories suspended in time.

There are many significant layers to this change, and others quite superficial. This post is about the latter.

1. I use semi-rotten vegetables in my cooking, carefully cutting around the spoiled bits and putting to good use the parts that are still firm and of their original color.

2. I use the last drops of soap, face cream, lotion, perfume and laundry detergent, whereas previously, sick of the texture or scent, I would have tossed them out when it became necessary to store the containers upside-down in order to coax out the final, lazy bits of product.

3. I have come to peace with having a maid.

4. I am prone to stare back at those staring at me.

5. I eat a variety of canned foods, on a regular basis.

6. My definition of a treat includes: cheese, real vanilla or lemon extract, cold cuts, granola, bacon, nuts, grapes, peaches, zucchini, cherry tomatoes, microwave popcorn, black beans, etc.

7. I no longer think it is strange to iron every single article of clothing that I own (rather, to have every single article of clothing that I own ironed).

8. I wear a jacket, scarf and boots in 22C weather, and still feel cold.

9. I eat Indian and Thai food on a weekly basis.

10. A trip to the hick-ridden mall in Nelspruit is a treat.

11. Having the indicators/tail lights/mirrors stolen off our car is not a motive for anger, rather just a trip by Zeca to the Mercado Estrela on our behalf.

12. The phrase, "Se faz favor," is firmly incorporated in my vocabulary.

13. I think 2pm is a normal time to have lunch.

14. The prospect of a bucket shower is not horrifying. Rather, I know the exact proportion of hot to cold water necessary for a relaxing cleanse.

15. I can speak pidgin Portuguese without thinking.

16. I have minimal brand loyalty.

17. I send all my "good" clothes to the dry cleaners, or simply don't wear them at all.

18. I am used to mold, cockroaches and rats.

19. I don't feel right traveling without a capulana.

20. I have developed a bladder of steel, and am able to go over 6 hours without peeing if necessary, a skill finely honed while doing fieldwork in rural Zambézia and Nampula.

21. My definition of a toilet too gross to use has changed significantly. Long drop? No problem.

22. I can eat a chicken so the bones are clean at the end.

23. I am willing to eat a fish head.

24. I no longer think the word "Nice" used in a Portuguese context sounds bizzare.

25. Coconuts really can be a fun night out.

26. Every time I pass a wedding party, I look for the personalized license plates on the front and back of the car carrying the bride and groom.

27. I actually like xima, as long as it has some tomato sauce.

28. I have become immune to the magnitude of donations: 25 million no longer seems like an impressive number for a 5-year project.

29. Cynicism is second-nature, in particular when it comes to humanitarian aid and NGOs.

30. I am not ashamed to ask for help when parallel parking.

31. I gladly let the guard carry my heavy suitcase up the stairs, and don't feel at all guilty.

32. I let the dishes pile up over the weekend, again absent of guilt.

33. Not having internet is no reason for a panic.

34. I can hold my own in a meeting with government officials.

35. My need to shop for clothes and shoes has reduced drastically.

36. It's not at all odd to have people from 15 different countries in my living room for a dinner party.

37. I now understand that nothing is too old, too worn, too seemingly useless to be passed on or donated. Even the most tattered pair of shoes can be of use to someone.

38. I regularly run red lights while driving and don't realize I am doing anything out of order until someone (i.e. my mother) comments.

39. I am more prone to shouting obscenities at fellow drivers.

40. I spend 10+ hours a day on the computer.

41. I drink on weekdays without a second thought.

42. I complain about the dry weather when the humidity drops below 50%.

43. I read celebrity gossip every single day. Perez Hilton, I love you!

44. I place immense value on each piece of furniture in our home.

45. I am willing to buy expensive art.

46. Business class on a flight to the US seems a necessity, though I'm more than willing to take a bus to Joburg if the ticket on LAM seems absurdly expensive.

47. I can spot a South African accent a mile away.

48. A quick way to annoy me is to refer to "Africa" as a whole, rather than recognize there are multiple and diverse individual countries on the continent.

49. I would never, ever wear my hair in braids or dreads, even if you paid me.

50. I am happy to have a complicated background and life story.

The Long Road to Our New Home

Friends, it's been a crazy past couple of weeks. Here's the lowdown on what's been going on in our corner of the world lately:

- Endless paperwork and bureaucracy has been the definite theme. Rico is applying for his US residency visa, and we are trying to purchase a house in California prior to our move. I believe Rico and I now have notarized, sworn translations of every official document issued to us from birth, as well as a full picture of our financial standing thanks having to cough up tax returns, account statements and employment contracts seemingly from the beginning of time.

- A word to the wise: You know that old song "If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife"? Well, here's my 2009 version. If you wanna have a straightforward, paperwork-free, easy life, never make non-resident alien your wife. Or in my case, husband. Seriously, I don't know how people who aren't compulsively organized and perfectly bilingual make it through this process. Totally worth it though. Obviously.

- Rico went for his compulsory health exam last week in Johannesburg as part of the visa application process. I am happy to report that, as evidenced by a chest X-ray, my husband doesn't suffer from TB.

- My mother-in-law is here for a visit, her first time in Africa. We picked her up at the airport in Joburg, then promptly proceeded to get lost downtown while trying to find the medical clinic. We had a GPS, and it was useless thanks to the Wiki-style maps we have for South Africa that didn't recognize our intended destination. We circled nervously and aimlessly for about an hour, with my MIL in the back seat. Apparently she later confessed to Rico that she thinks we are a great couple with a promising future because we didn't kill each other in the car.

- We went to Kruger park with my MIL, and it was fabulous. We saw a pride of 8 lions, and every other animal imaginable except for the reclusive leopard.

- Rico and I put an offer on a beautiful house yesterday, along with my mom who has helped us beyond measure in the prequalification process. Now we wait. By the end of the week, we will know if the house is to be ours. This is a very tidy way to sum up what has been weeks of high stress, all leading to the biggest decision in my and Rico's life since marriage. We are all praying this house works out, because it is an incredible opportunity and we are totally in love with it already.

- We are starting to sell our furniture and other posessions here in Maputo. It's a strange process, and a daunting one for sure, but I find it quite appealing. Although I cling to certain objects, I find it cleansing to have a big purge of posessions every few years. We will leave Moz with 2 suitcases each, 3 cats and 1 cargo box containing an antique chandelier and an old wooden trunk. That's it. Chega.

- The prospect of starting fresh in a new house is thrilling. I loved putting together this apartment, making it our home. We started with next to nothing, and used wicker furniture and slept on a mattress on the floor for nearly 2 years. Now our flat is comfortable and beautifully decorated. I know we will be starting close to zero again with the new house in California, but I am not at all regretful because the process is so satisfying, and starting humble really makes you appreciate every little improvement, every new piece of furniture or painted wall.

- Rico and I have the big visa interview on Monday. Please keep us in your thoughts.

So that's it in a nutshell. I am also currently working 3 jobs, but I won't even go into the details because more than anything, I need to get off the blog and get them done.

Corujas

Check out the pair of owls that came to roost on my mother-in-law's verandah in Recreio, Rio de Janeiro. Beautiful, aren't they? Anybody know what kind of owls they might be?



I always feel awe when I come across an owl. Here in Mozambique (and in other parts of Africa, if I'm not mistaken), owls have a pretty negative connotation and are associated with death and sorcery.

I vividly remember coming across some huge owls while driving at night between Espungabera and Chimoio, holding my breath while they flapped their wings as if in slow motion and took flight just in the nick of time.

Just last month while doing field work in Gurue, in a gorgeous part of Zambézia province, my friend Andrew and I saw a big owl swoop down at night to catch some unseen creature in the lawn in front of the dormitory where we were staying.

I also clearly remember owls from my childhood. There were several barn owls that lived in the trees surrounding the house where I grew up in New Mexico. As part of school activity in 7th or 8th grade, we had to find and dissect owl pellets. Pretty crazy stuff. You can see from the droppings how easily these creatures can take on macabre associations.

Nonetheless, they are on my good list. They eat rodents and snakes, and just with that I'm happy to have them around.