Friday, May 25, 2018
Catching Feelings
I just watched the South African film "Catching Feelings" by director-actor Kagiso Lediga. It came up as a suggestion on Netflix and I jumped on it. The cinematography left me with massive nostalgia for Johannesburg: the jacaranda-lined streets, the gray skies, the unique vibe, and oh that accent...I so miss that accent! But it wasn't all purple blossoms and good times: there was also realistic portrayal of the challenges in urban South Africa: drunk driving, bribing police, fenced and guarded homes and accompanying race-based fear, immediate discrimination of the main character by both whites and blacks when he loses his shoes and appears poor and possibly homeless, shantytown tourism by wealthy white foreigners, sexism, cell phone addiction, and in general lots of moral ambiguity.
I found it interesting that there was a distinction between Cape Town's racial situation (the only black people in a hip, upscale restaurant are the main character's party and the waiters; the student body at the university is majority white) and that of Joburg (portrayal of many middle and upper-middle class blacks with prominent positions in companies and academic institutions; nice restaurants and social events with racially diverse patrons; mixed race couples and friends groups; university student body majority black).
Although the movie is about an unhappy marriage and the moral boundaries of the main couple and their friends, the subtext is all about identity and racial politics (to paraphrase the main character, "I'm South African, everything is about race"). I appreciated that the film's perspective was not Eurocentric, and as an American I was interested in the subtle and not-so-subtle differences between our racial issues and those in South Africa. While I really enjoyed the film overall, I found the characters to be over-acted and many of the scenarios unbelievable, in particular the white "old man" author and how readily he is able to influence the main character and his wife, and how he is invited into their home. White privilege was brought up in the film but not explored very much, and I found it of note that colorism was not discussed at all (although it was most definitely present). Also how about those double standards regarding cheating for the main character and his wife?? And actually for the men in general? Ugh.
The role of alcohol and drugs in the film also struck me. The movie is basically about moral choices and behavioral gray area, and in 100% of the moments where characters make a critical move, they are massively drunk or high. It was frustrating to watch seemingly intelligent, educated, cultured, and independent characters lose all their willpower and convictions anytime alcohol is offered. Again, like the white privilege issue, there was a moment where the partying was scrutinized (Is this a problem? Do I need to be worried about you?), but instead of further exploring it, the questioner just jumped on the bandwagon and went bottoms up herself.
I guess I have a lot of critical points, and the movie definitely left me with a lot of food for thought. Overall, I definitely recommend it and am happy I took a chance on a random Netflix suggestion.
A final note is that the soundtrack to Catching Feelings was excellent. Tracks are listed below:
Chimanga – Dorothy Masuka
Let Me Live – Mpho Pholo & Moneoa Moshesh
Lenyora – Philip Tabane
Mama Liza – The Movers
Ngud (Ilala Vuka) – Kwesta featuring Casper Nyovest
Mahlalela (A.K.A Lazy Bones) by Letta Mbulu
Noma Themba – Letta Mbulu
Voice Inside – Lerato Moiloa
Joburg Girl – MXO
Ngubani Gama Lakho – MXO
Jungle Fever – MXO
Bring Back the Love – MXO
iZolo – MXO
Soweto Disco – The Movers
Why are you here – Ishmael Osekre
UNH! – Philip Tabane
Vidala Para Mi Sombra – Juana Pires Rafael and Ariel Zamonsky
100KMACASETTE by Okmalumkoolkat
Monsieur Bon Bon – Ebenhaezer Dibakwane
Mpahlenkulu – Mabiza and Zah
I Need You – David Kibuuka
Monday, August 15, 2016
Hands and Meteors and a Song
This song just hit me hard. Driving up the hill in Point Richmond after spending the evening at the gallery with my friend Carolyn and brainstorming jewelry stuff for our show, and for our lives. It felt good to be there, in that space. A welcome coming-round of sorts after being very burned out.
Saturday, June 14, 2014
Portugal Street Art
Monday, November 21, 2011
A Good Feeling
In some ways I feel like this song is getting me through the semester. Just when I'm feeling really down, I'll hear this somewhere. In my car at full volume is the best, but Hipline's shimmy pop class is a close second (Hipline is this amazing dance studio in Berkeley that I've been going to with some of the jewelry girls from school. They have glow sticks and a disco ball during the last class on Thursdays, not to mention super dim lighting (the best idea e.v.e.r. for club-style dance classes that happen in a gym space during daylight hours.))
Saturday, August 20, 2011
The Sounds of Last Semester
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Braving the Elements

Last night Rico and I joined our neighbors at the Bridge School benefit concert. The weather wasn't the best, but we got out the rain gear and blankets and made the most of the evening.
Since school rules my life these days, Rico and I decided to head home early because I needed to do some paint mixing exercises and study for my art history midterm. We missed Pearl Jam, which I'm gutted about, but were able to see some great artists including Neil Young, Lucinda Williams and Jackson Browne.
Friday, August 27, 2010
New Music Obsession
Monday, July 26, 2010
Sounds Like Summer
I can't get enough of this song. Makes me want to dance every time I hear it. Pure summer genius.
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Cinco de Mayo con Julieta
Here are a couple of my favorite songs by Julieta Venegas. Wish y'all were here to join us!
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Mexico Meets Bossa
Friday, March 12, 2010
Currently on My Playlist
Now I'm loving having a soundtrack again, especially during my early-morning drawing sessions (I've found that 5:30am is my golden hour for doing elaborate, hours-long drawing assignments for class).
Enjoy!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Better Stock Up on Capulanas...

I'm actually really looking forward to the video from Beyoncè and Alicia Keys' new song they are working on together. Should be pretty fab if the still photos from the video shoot are any indication.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Songs for a Stormy Day
A little Chilean-Swedish rap to kick things off:
Some Jamaican music that reminds me of Maputo( why don't these girls get more airtime in the US??):
A bit of kwaito from South Africa:
It's not a dance party without a little Naija:
Gracias a la vida...musica mexicana linda:
Monday, January 18, 2010
A Chuva Vem Me Dizer...
So instead, here's another Marisa Monte video with some of the sweetest, most clever lyrics every. It's in Portuguese, but I believe there is a translate feature. I'd be curious to know if it's at all accurate because this is a hard one to take out of context.
Anyhow, I'm on storm drain duty this morning. We have a drain next to our house that collects all of the runoff from the street (it's the lowest point on the block) and in theory channels the water through a tube down to another storm drain, and eventually to the Bay. The problem is that it gets clogged up with leaves and sticks quite easily, thus blocking the drain and causing the runoff to accumulate and spill over into our front garden causing a mini-arroyo.
Usually Rico is the one to brave the rain and unclog the drain using a broom, but he's at a meeting so that duty fell to me this morning. Of course, it's the hardest rain of the season and by the time I got my boots and rainjacket on, the water had pooled up and was halfway up my calves. I couldn't even find the drain because there was so much water, so I had to use my bare hands to feel around for the debris, then clear away handfulls of debris until the drain was flowing again. I can appreciate how people get hypothermia so quickly in cold water. After about 30 seconds of cleaning, I couldn't feel my fingers at all, and rainwater seeped into my rubber boots over the top brim, making my toes go numb as well.
Anyhow, the situation is under control and I'm now going to make a cup of tea and start on my homework for drawing class. I have to do contour drawings of a pair of my shoes, which should be fun. I'm torn between my Hugo Boss black high heels that are full of pleated leather, or these cute purple mules by Clark's that have a stacked heel and nice detailing on the toe.
Or, I suppose I could draw my rain boots...
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Shine
Rico and I listened to the entire album while driving to and from Joburg last month (we chose to drive to Joburg as opposed to flying because it costs US$450 per person to go on the 45-minute flight from Maputo, which is absurd!) and are both totally hooked on Estelle's music. All the tracks are brilliant, and I've not been so into an album of this style since Lauryn Hill.
The best song, however, is the title track. Both Rico and I have been singing it all week. "Oh, this is my song, and just like you I got a right to stay strong...I'm gonna shine, gonna shine, gonna shine while my light's on." Amen to that!
Monday, March 17, 2008
Pequena Has a Home and Other Updates
1. I am now a confident driver on the "other side". I am loving the CRV, and loving even more the independence having a car provides. I still need some serious work on parking, however, especialy parallel parking. Just thinking about it makes me nervous.
2. My mom arrives tomorrow for a 6-day visit. I can't wait! It will be her first time in Mozambique. We had hoped to take her to Kruger, but since it is Easter Weekend, we've decided against it. You couldn't pay me to cross the border over the holiday, as it is one of the peak traffic periods and we don't have the luxury of cutting through to the VIP line as we don't have diplomatic status. Sorry, mom. If you want to see big animals, I suppose you'll just have to come back for another visit!
3. Pequena has found a new home! My old colleagues June and JR came over yesterday for lunch, and they decided to take the kitten back with them to the farm. I think it will be perfect, as Pequena is very energetic and will enjoy running around outdoors, and she seemed to really like June and JR. I actually miss the little one. Over the past week, she and I had bonded...
4. The Lura concert on Friday was off the hook! I've never seen so many people at Coconuts - every square inch was packed with people. The music was amazing, Lura was beautiful on stage, and everyone seemed to be having a great time. There was one disappointing moment, when Jenny and I were the brunt of some stupid racial comments while trying to make our way through the crowd, but I can honestly say that it is the exception and not the norm here in Mozambique. Nonetheless, it made me really angry, and I only managed to stop thinking about the comments when the concert ended and the nightclub music started... Dancing is always a great way to clear one's mind and renew one's energy.
5. I am still super tired. Not surprising, given the rhythm of the past few days.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Convert
After several months here, I warmed to Mozambique's unique Afro-Latino style of music and started really enjoying artists like Lizha James, Dama do Bling, Zico, MC Roger, etc. Although it's not the most intellectual music ever produced, it's wonderful for dancing and certainly captures the feel of this country.
More surprising than my enjoyment of Afro-Latino music (it's really just a step off from the salsa and merengue I was craving, mixed with some hip-hop and a slightly different beat) is the fact that I've now become a lover of house music! It sort of crept up on me, until one day last month when I found myself downloading songs in the electronic section of iTunes and copying my friend Heleno's extensive collection of house music.
I don't think it's necessarily about the music, though I do definitely like the style and agree that it's some of the best stuff around to guarantee an upbeat night out. No, I think it has to do much more with the memories associated with the songs. I now have many fond memories of Maputo. This city definitely feels like home in many ways (though in others, I still feel like the supreme fish out of water), and each good night out dancing or spent driving around in the company of friends, it just reinforces the connection between good times in Maputo and the unique soundtrack of this place.
Proof positive that I am in a Maputo-inspired music appreciation phase is the soundtrack I've chosen for my first few days driving around in the silver CRV: all house music. I am especially obsessed with the song "Bleeding Heart" by David Vendetta feat. Rachel Starr. Definitely my Maputo memories song of the moment.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Music, 'Cause It's Easy to Write About
"Primer Dia" - Julieta Venegas
"Motownphilly" - Boyz II Men
"Whine Up" - Kat DeLuna feat. Elephant Man
"Be Without You" - Mary J. Blige (club mix)
"Break My Fall" - Tiësto & BT
"Doo Bee Doo" - Freshlyground
"Ermons di Terra" - Manecas Costa
"The Way I Are" - Timbaland feat. Keri Hilson
"7" - Prince
"I Fell in Love with the DJ" - Che'nelle
"Nuna Wa Mina" - Lizha James
"Babylon" - Zeca Baleiro
Some really cool passada songs whose name and artist I don't know...
Today is a day for happy music. Shame it's, like, 400 degrees outside otherwise I think I'd be dancing in the streets, or at least cruising around in a car with the stereo turned up too loud. :)
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Amidst the Chaos, Unexpected Bonds
After a day of rioting and chaos due to an approximate 50% increase in the cost of public taxis, things seem back to normal in Maputo and Matola.
Things were calm at our office in Matola for most of yesterday morning, though Paulo and Raimundo were very anxious due to the disturbances in the suburbs, and the news I was accompanying online didn't look too good, either.
We kept hearing rumors that the disturbances were coming our way, but I didn't really believe the situation would get bad. That is, until I heard about 6 shots fired too close to our office for comfort in the early afternoon!
Most of the people in the office had already gone home for the day, as they depended on public transport to get around and knew they must leave hours in advance if they wanted to get to their houses before nightfall. Those of us left in the office promptly decided to evacuate after the gunfire.
Hugh Marlboro went with Ludmila to try and fetch her young daughter from a school down the road. I quickly arranged for the JAC truck and Ahmed's car to be locked in the lot behind the warehouse (he wasn't at the office, but his car and keys were), then hopped in a truck with JR, the manager of the transport sector, and his wife June, one of the financial managers.
As we left the office, we could see burning tires on the road not 500m from where we were, and masses of people were already blocking the highway back to Maputo. It was eerie to be the only vehicle on the road - literally - and have everyone staring at you, the air thick with anticipation of something about to push past a critical point of stability.
Since most of the administrative employees live on the farms, that was where we headed, as it was in the opposite direction of the rioting, and we would be relatively well set-up to wait out the situation. As we headed out of town, things became increasingly calmer, and I could see my colleagues letting out sighs of relief.
Not that I wasn't concerned about the rioting, I was just affected quite differently by the situation compared to my Afrikaner colleagues. It was apparent that the mass protests and the violence triggered memories of past situations for them. We talked about it, how they were reminded of the "old days" in South Africa, the familiar feeling of being the odd ones out - for various reasons - and therefore some of the most apparent targets.
One of my colleagues, Chinney, became gray in the face in response to the chaos. Normally he is a tough, fat little man who compulsively smokes cigarettes and has his lip upturned in distaste whenever not curled around a smoke. Not yesterday afternoon. He just looked as if he wanted to crawl inside a bunker and drink whisky until the problems blew over.
JR, an ex-military man who admittedly did some "not-so-nice-things in Mozambique years ago, but we all have to make peace with history at some point", immediately went back into special-ops mode and started telling me about the strategies to spread cells of violence throughout the conflict area and cut off the principal access points. One couldn't be sure if he was referring to Maputo, or just remembering general bits of said not-so-nice history. [As a side note, JR is one of my new favorite people at the office. He has an intriguing past, between the military stint and working in a diamond mine, but he also is a major history buff and a great defender of the environment. I like talking to him because he breaks sterotypes right and left, especially when reflecting on how one comes to accept actions in one's past that one now recognizes as atrocious. Also, he has a wicked sense of humor, one of these people who is always friendly and always has the perfect joke ready.]
Anyhow, poor June, JR's wife, was just very talkative the entire time. She said the tension reminded her of the armed robbery that had happened last year to the family back in South Africa. She smoked long, thin, gold-tipped cigarettes and chattered away to ease her nerves.
June commented that I was incredibly calm and level-headed in dealing with the situation. I do tend to become quite rational in times of crisis, but I think what was underlying my relatively relaxed state was the fact that I am an outsider. This specific type of violence simply is not part of my past. It is not part of the collective past of my family or my peers in the US, or even in Brazil, though each of these places has their similar issues (i.e. terrorism attempts and armed assaults, respectively). The mass riots by a largely black population simply did not represent a trigger for me in the same way they did for my colleagues. That, plus the fact that I speak fluent Brazilian Portuguese, gave me a sense of calm and confidence, not that I thought I was invincible to the violence or anything, but still...
We drove out to the farm, to the house where JR and June just moved in last week. All of their things were still largely in boxes, and they were certainly not prepared for visitors. Nonetheless, they offered me and my colleague Chinney wonderful hospitality.
To "celebrate" our arrival at the farm, we all piled into JR and June's diesel-converted Kombi bus and bumped down the pothole-ridden road to the local bush bar for beers. This bar was literally one table with four mismatched chairs on a random slab of concrete, with a pretty young woman called Maria serving whatever cool drinks and alcohol had been brought out that week from Boane. This was the first time that all of us had been together in a social situation, but the conversation flowed quite nicely, thanks in part to copious amounts of alcohol and empty stomachs (I am happy to report, however, that I remembered last Friday's sad state and moderated my rate of consumption.)
June and I had the instantly bonding experience of using the makeshift toilet behind the bar together after she announced the need to pee. It was basically two reed partitions joined at an angle to create a cover for the person relieving him or herself on the red, dusty dirt. I thought it was a pretty good deal, as I was expecting a long-drop, one of the more revolting forms of toilet as far as I am concerned. June, however, was intimidated and, I think, a bit clueless as to what to do behind the screen. "Go ahead, just have a squat and go for it," I encouraged her. "I'll keep watch for you from here." Once she was done, I had her keep watch while I peed, even though I didn't really have a full bladder, just to make her feel a bit better about what I know, given her very conservative roots, had been quite the experience.
After sufficient beers and conversation, I negotiated the price of a bottle of whisky for us, bought 12 bottled sodas, and we got back in the Kombi to rustle up some dinner at the farm house. JR is a fabulous cook, I found out, and he made us pasta with a slow-cooked empty-pantry sauce made of ground beef, canned beans, garlic, fresh chilies, and a secret blend of spices that I know at least contained ketchup and monkey gland sauce. Granted, I was starving by the time we finally got around to eating, but it was an incredibly delicious meal.
All through the night, I was texting and calling Rico, Ahmed, Paulo and Luigi to get updates on the rioting in Maputo and Matola. The news was not encouraging - burning tires, throwing stones, blocked access routes, torched vehicles - and I had already resigned myself to staying on the farm for the night.
Chinney, however, who lives just one street down from our office, was intent on going back home that night. He thought that since he lived just off the highway at the entrance to Matola, he'd be okay. Despite JR's warning that it was not a good idea, Chinney got in his truck and drove back to Matola by himself around 10pm. About 45 minutes later, we got a desperate call from him on June's cell phone. "They've put a huge padlock on my gate. I can't get in my house. There are mobs of people everywhere, the streets look like a carnival party. I want to go back to the farm, but I have no petrol and no meticiais to buy some. What must I do??" I consulted with JR and Paulo, who was in Matola at his sister's house, and we came up with a plan. After a bit of wheeling and dealing with contacts, JR managed to buy some petrol using rands, and was able to head back towards the plantation.
When he arrived at the farm house, June immediately presented him with a whisky, and we all went to the lounge to play some pool, one of the few things that was unpacked and ready for use in the house. June put on a mix cd with The Eagles, The Beach Boys, The Police and some random Afrikaans rock, and cranked the volume. At that point, what with all the alcohol and nerves, we were all in altered states. Chinney and I were on a team, and got creamed by JR and June, who obviously had been getting in some good practice on the pool table. Despite our loss, Chinney played the air guitar and did the twist, while JR and June celebrated by singing along to the music at the top of their lungs, dancing as if nobody else were in the room. It was then that June announced - technically, it was her birthday, as the clock had just passed midnight.
We had some Ricoffy with milk and sugar to celebrate, then talked for another hour or so until sleep was inevitable. I slept in a twin bed with Barbie sheets, and wore one of JR's giant trucking t-shirts as pajamas. I brushed my teeth with my finger, and quenched my thirst by drinking straight out of the bathroom tap (there was, to my horror, no drinking water available in the house, and I knew that June would freak out if I told her I was ingesting farm water!). Incredibly, I managed to get some sleep, and was woken up by the constant hum of the 100,000 layer hens clucking away at the egg project site just a kilometer away from the plantation.
In the morning, all of us nursing hangovers to one extent or another, we made calls to our colleagues in Maputo and Matola to get the latest updates. Apparently, at 5am, an agreement was made with the Prime Minister for the chapa price to go back to the previous range of 5 to 7.5 meticais. To compensate for increased operating costs over the years, and to avoid backlash from the taxi drivers, the Government agreed to subsidize fuel.
As the situation seemed safe, we decided to drive back into Matola. Fortunately for me, Ahmed had gone to pick up his car from the office at just the same time, so I was able to get a ride back to Maputo with him. It was incredibly nice to be back at home, with Rico, with the boys, with no need to go out for anything for the rest of the day.
The way the streets looked this morning will stay with me for quite some time - burned out vehicle shells lying on the side of the highway, debris everywhere, the guardrails on the EN4 completely ripped out of the ground, the chain link fence that used to serve as a median twisted and bent where people had trampled over the metal, still smoldering bits of tires and tree trunks in piles on the asphalt. However, I will equally remember the way that I unexpectedly bonded with JR, June and Chinney in the midst of the confusion. I wonder how long it would have taken for us to have the kind of conversations we had last night if it weren't for the rioting, or if they would have even happened at all...
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
It Sounded Like Such a Sweet Song
These days I feel I can barely keep my head above water. Back when I was doing freelance consulting, working from home, and waking up whenever I pleased to start the day, time seemed to be an endless commodity. Now that I am working full time at a company, however, it is a completely different story. Not only am I occupied during commercial hours, our office is in Matola (a good 25 minutes outside Maputo) and I have no car, putting me completely at the mercy of pleading rides to go to and from work each day. Either that or pay $15 one-way for a taxi, which gets old after a while. And, just a final little note, because I work with a bunch of crazy people I have no lunch break (not like I could go anywhere on my own even if I did given my transport situation), so the possibility of getting errands done in the middle of the day is out as well.
The result of all of this? I have a to-do list about a mile long that I just can't seem to tackle. I'm stressed enough that I finally had to put up a limit today. I've gotten permission to go to work 2 hours late tomorrow so that I can get a taxi and ride around the city like a mad woman trying to get all my shit done.
And, to add to the craziness, jewelry production is on in full force. Every day when I come home from work I sit at my improvised crafts table and lose myself in silver wire, trade beads and gemstones. Time flies, which is something I have mixed feelings about at the moment. But I am getting a lot done, and I am totally in love with some of my new designs. The big national crafts fair starts a week from today, plus I am making a few custom pieces for a blog-friend in the UK who will be coming to Mozambique next month. Pictures soon, I promise.
Predictably, the honeymoon period is starting to wear off at my job. I still love my work, and am very glad I took the opportunity, but my eyes are now able to see the other side of the coin. I could sum it up by saying that, for all of his amazing qualities, keen business skills and vast knowledge of world history, Hugh Marlboro is also capable of being incredibly difficult. I'm not sure what part of it is due to cultural or generational differences, and what part is due to his own unique personality, but there are definitely aspects of my boss that I find hard to swallow. For now, I am picking and choosing my battles (especially until my 3-month probation period is over), but there are certain things that simply won't fly in the long run that we'll have to work out. So it goes with every relationship, I suppose...
I am starting to pick up some Changana (Shangaan) at work, thanks to the boys in the warehouse. So far I can remember cacata (cheapskate) and mamparra (equivalent to the Brazilian mané - who has a good definition for this in English?). Not sure on the spellings, but at least I am retaining a few words. For as good as I tend to be with languages, Changana has certainly gone in one ear and out the other without leaving much behind over the last 2 years.
The other day I was in my office and heard the boys that help around the warehouse singing work songs as they unloaded sacks of potatoes and onions from one of the reefer trucks in our fleet.
"How wonderful," I though to myself. "What a lovely, authentic cultural experience."
I listened for a few minutes to the strong voice of the leader call out a verse, and the different harmonies that the other boys would do when calling back the chorus. The melody was simple, but made truly beautiful by the blending of tones and the syncopated rhythm. Occasionally someone made a show of hand-clapping or foot-stomping to accent a particular point in the song.
Wanting to appreciate the music from a closer place, I went down to the warehouse and sat with Ahmed, who was observing the workers unloading the truck to be sure none of the stock was deviated or damaged.
"What a pretty song," I commented. "What are they singing?"
"Ummm, it's in Changana."
"I know, but you speak Changana. Don't you understand the lyrics?"
Ahmed shifted uncomfortably in his chair, then took a deep breath and looked up at me. "Do you really want to know?"
"Yes!" I insisted.
And he proceeded to translate one of the dirtiest yet simple song lyrics one could imagine.
So much for my impression that this was a nice, innocent manifestation of culture. Well, I suppose it was an expression of culture, just that of a group of horny 16-year-old boys, not that of a wise Bantu heritage. I don't know what I was expecting - lyrics about the rising sun, or the destructive nature of floods, or the blessings of grain and milk - but it certainly wasn't what Ahmed translated for me.
Ah, yes. Boys will be boys, the world around...