On Becoming Boring

It's a thought that crosses my mind frequently these days: I'm becoming boring. More accurately, perhaps, I already have.

For so much of my life I lived abroad, traveled at every opportunity to places far, far off the beaten track, attended house parties frequented by an achingly cool international crowd, befriended people on planes and long-haul bus trips, changed plans in whatever way suited my fancy, and generally threw caution to the wind. I had many adventures, that's for sure, and a lot of my identity became defined by that exciting expat-traveler lifestyle.

Not that I wasn't aware of the downsides of the path I'd chosen. The frequent loneliness and depression, the culture shock and reverse culture shock, the isolation from family, the inevitable distancing from friends. Still, despite the negative aspects, it was a hell of an exciting way to live.

For the last couple of years, I've been shifting out of that mode. There were signs of it in Mozambique, as I increasingly craved time at home, with Rico and the cats, doing nothing and going nowhere. I thought it was a natural reaction to the crazy work habits we'd been keeping, taking on every freelance job that came across our plates. I figured I was burned out, in need of a break.

Then we moved to Casa Cali and the introverted, homebody tendencies continued strong. I rationalized that it was because we'd just moved, that in time I'd want to venture out and explore, that we'd make friends, that my old adventure-seeking self would bounce back.

Nearly two years in, and that hasn't exactly happened. I still feel like I'm plain, stay-home Jane. I have very little desire to go out, even to the city. My days are spent in the studio, gardening, hanging out at home. Social events sort of exhaust me. I can't remember the last time I set foot in a dance club or went to a fantastic late-night party, much less take a spontaneous weekend trip. We have a mortgage. We're in bed by midnight. Signs abound pointing to my very adult life.

Part of me loves this slower, home-oriented pace. I spent lots of quality time with Rico and my mom. I hang out with the cats. I cook and decorate and get my hands dirty in the garden. I make lots of art. It's relaxing, comforting work. More than anything I like the stability, the idea that Rico and I are building our home at Casa Cali and we will never, ever have to pack boxes and move ourselves halfway across the world again.

Another part of me, however, feels like I've let the train pass me by. I turn 30 in the fall, and I can't quite believe I'm this settled, this quiet, this grown-up. If I'm like this at nearly-30, the panicky part of me wonders, what will I be like at 40, or 50? When will I ever be adventurous and spontaneous again? When will I visit Lençóis Maranhenses, hike Monte Roraima, attend the Festival au Desert in Timbuktu? When will I do any of the other things that have been on my dreams list for years if all I want to do at this point is stay home? Because after art school comes kids, or so the plan goes, and if I find it hard to lead an "exciting" life now, I can only imagine how distant that concept will be with a child or two on scene.

I guess this is part of the grand cycle of getting older, making choices, becoming more conscious about what path you follow and how you spend your time. What a strange, bittersweet feeling to mourn and long for the person you once were, while at the same time not regretting for one instant the person you've become.

This Tropical Life

April Showers Bring...May Showers.

I wish it would stop raining. We've had an atypically wet winter and spring here at Casa Cali and, while we're grateful for the full reservoirs and reduced fire danger, I find myself longing for sun and warmer temperatures. I am happier when it feels like summer outside, no question.

At least one upside to all this rain is that it makes for easier gardening. Rico and I are still waging a war on weeds, blackberry and ivy, those overly aggressive inhabitants of our backyard. We're making progress, though. We just covered a large portion of the big hill with a layer of weed-block fabric, burlap and bark chips. Hopefully it will do the trick and that part of the garden will remain clean.

We watched the final match of the Champion's League this morning with A. and D., a couple we've become friends with. He's a fanatic Barcelona supporter and a hilarious heckler, so it made for a really good time.

Later in the afternoon, Rico and I took the cats to the vet for a checkup. Never my favorite thing to do. Going to the vet stresses me out so much, I feel almost as worn out as the cats do once we are finished. Everyone seemingly has a clean bill of health, so we're hopefully good for another year.

We have a fire going in the fireplace this evening, complete with red wine and a game or two of Scrabble. Hard to believe given that it's Memorial Day Weekend, a holiday I associate with sundresses, barbecues and pool parties. Still, not a bad proposition at all...

1,000

I remember the night I started writing this blog. It was almost summer in Austin and I was in the process of packing up my apartment. I'd decided to move to Mozambique, that it was time for an(other) adventure. I had a ridiculously heavy Toshiba laptop that took up most of the cheap build-it-yourself workstation in the corner of my living room. Azul was sprawled out along the top of my chair, purring contently. I worried about finding a buyer for my Saturn sedan, whether my plane ticket to Maputo would arrive in the mail in time, what exact assortment of clothes I should put in my already overstuffed suitcase.

That night seems like an eternity ago, much more than the six-ish years that have passed. I feel like a totally different person now, and in many ways I am.

This blog started out with humble intentions - to record my experiences in Africa and beyond in a way that was accessible to my friends and family - but it turned into something much greater. I never could have anticipated the number of people I'd meet, virtually and in person, as a result of my writing. What an amazing age we live in that these sort of connections are possible.

Thanks to all of you who have joined me here over the past few years. It's been a pleasure to get to know you, and your presence makes me want to be a better, more diligent writer.

Here's to the next 1,000 posts.

love,

Ali

Loved

Can you see it? The faint heart and scrawled red word on this otherwise unmarked gravestone? It makes me wonder who lies here, and who so touchingly left this message. Are they family? Or was it a stranger visiting another grave who decided to give love to someone seemingly without?

My mom and I had visited this old Japanese cemetery before, fifteen years ago, while aimlessly exploring the back roads of Hanalei. We managed to find it again this time, with the help of Google, as our memories weren't quite clear enough to remember that you had to turn up Kumu Road, not the much longer Old Powerhouse Road. I'm glad we were able to revisit.

The Plan for Summer 2011

My goals for this summer include:

1. Redesign my website. Increasingly I find myself wanting a site where I can show my portfolio of jewelry and metal objects I've made in art school, as well as other forms of art I find myself drawn to (i.e. work with patterns and painting). I want people to be able to see what I've made in the past and what I'm currently working on, not just what I have for sale. I'm in a funny position being in school. The jewelry I'm making right now is very different from what I've done in the past (basically higher-end, metal-based pieces vs. beaded and wire-work jewelry), but because each piece takes so much time and effort, it's hard to offer them for sale. I can still keep chugging along with the strung/wire jewelry because it's relatively fast to make, so that's what I'll primarily keep selling until I've graduated, I imagine. What I sell isn't representative anymore of the direction my art is headed, and I want a way for my website to reflect the whole picture.

2. Train for a 10k. I used to be one of those people who hated running with a passion. Running was suffering, a form of punishment, a way to compensate when I'd been "bad" with food. Something shifted about a year ago. I discovered that I actually love to run now. It's still really hard some days, but the payoff I get in terms of stress management and a runner's high is unbeatable. Rico has also gotten into running, and our New Year's Resolution was to do a 10k. We're targeting a race in September, so this summer is the prime time to train. I'm currently running about 4-5 miles, so it definitely seems like a feasible goal.

3. Work in the studio. I have a lot of projects I'd like to start/finish over the summer. I need to fabricate the clasp and do some final chasing and repousse work on this giant silver necklace I'm making for my mom. It was actually one of my assignments this past semester, and I wasn't able to finish. More on that later. I'd also really like to tackle some side projects that I've had in mind for months. My goal is to go to the studio at school 3x/week.

4. Gardening. Lots and lots of it. We have so much to do at Casa Cali to get the yard in shape, and it's only going to happen if Rico and I are outside with our hands in the soil. We have blackberry and ivy to pull out, a second stone retaining wall to build, vegetables to plant and much more.

5. Home improvements. Paint Rico's home office Azure, a gorgeous hue of royal blue tinged with gray (paint was bought at least 6 months ago and we still haven't gotten to it). Finish replacing the flooring downstairs. We're ripping out old carpet and putting in cherry wood veneers. Rico already did the hallway and the guest room, now we need to do his office and mine.

6. Go to Houston for a long weekend. We have my cousins AJ and Renaud to visit, as well as Tia Lindy, our friend and ex-roommate from our days in Maputo, not to mention my college best friend Angel and her Brazilian husband Tony.

7. Do something lovely for our 3-year wedding anniversary in July. I'm thinking wine or beach, a day's drive away from Casa Cali at most.

8. Paint a few portraits and do some color mixing exercises. I fell in love with painting last year, and sadly haven't had much time to keep experimenting. This summer I'd like to paint my mom's portrait, see if I can find an old photo of my cousin's mom who passed away and try to paint her, and do lots of color mixing gradients. Dark to light, mixing complementary colors, etc. I actually love the technical aspect of learning to paint. I feel it's akin to doing your scales and learning theory when you play a musical instrument, only I always hated that part of playing the piano and avoided it like the plague. :)

9. Go pick fruit in Brentwood and do another round of canning. Rico thinks I'm crazy for liking to pick my own fruit. I think it's loads of fun. I'm thinking cherries again for sure, and maybe some peaches and nectarines.

a

10. Hang out with friends. I finally have a small group of people here in the Bay Area I consider friends, and I'd really like to take the opportunity to have them over for churrascos, go hiking, go to museums, go to concerts, etc. Some are school friends, others are random friends, but I'm looking forward to further developing our fledgling bonds.

Do you have any goals or plans for this summer?

Self-Portrait with Taro Fields

Kaua'i

The last time we were on this rainy island was 14 years ago. I was a teenager, upset that the rental car company wouldn't let me drive even though I had my license already in New Mexico, interested in, as my mom remembers it, virgin piña coladas and clothes shopping. Not that I was shallow, just 15.

To be fair, I do recall being thrilled with those tall, adult-looking drinks and the shops filled with batik-print tops and colorful swimsuits. I remember many other things, too. The rainy day (always the rain, it seems) that we went to the farmers' market and high-stepped through the mud to the stand with the lady with ribbon-entwined braids who gave us samples of breadfruit. The fish taco truck near the river bank, and the endless spotted green of the taro fields in the Hanalei valley. I remember being shocked when my mom picked up a hitchhiker on the side of the island's main road (a harmless-looking hippie college girl from Santa Cruz, but a stranger with her thumb out nonetheless), and the hundreds of miniature shells you could find among the grains of sand if you just looked hard enough and trained your eyes to see the right shapes.

I don't remember that we'd vacationed here three times previously, not two. I don't remember quite as many chickens (they are everywhere, and lay the most delightful pale blue and reddish-beige eggs), or that there was ever a threat of flash floods as a result of so. much. torrential. rain. I don't remember there being so many sophisticated restaurants, or such an emphasis on local, sustainably grown food. Then again, my eyes were focused on different things back in 1997, I suppose, and nobody's memory is infallible.

What began as a tradition of mother-daughter vacations has now evolved into mother-daughter-Rico. Plus a husband or plus a son-in-law, depending on whose perspective. We were all in need of a vacation, some of us more desperately than others, but all definitely due for some time away from the weight of our obligations and routines.

This morning, our first full day on Kaua'i, we all went for a run towards Tunnels Beach. It was early, enough so that the sun was just beginning to scorch and mothers were still waiting with their children by the roadside for the school bus to pass. My mom, Rico and I ran in a line, our heavy breath and pounding footsteps broken only by the occasional rooster's cackling or the friendly aloha-good-morning of a fellow jogger. It felt communal, cleansing, satisfying. The perfect start to a holiday.

Sundial

Early this morning, when the Bay was still dove gray and quiet, the sun rose at precisely the right angle as to brilliantly flash upon the lighthouse across the water in Tiburon. The shine was so intense it reflected a golden dagger of light onto the water, a sharp linear beam that seemed to indicate some divine moment or astronomical alignment. Alas, we are a far cry from the Maya or the early peoples who created Stonehenge. The golden line on the water was simply coincidence, an illuminated treat for those with their eyes open at the right time at the right random location. I took a photo, made some coffee, then went about my day. Still, I can't help but feel I witnessed some special sign.

Home Stretch

I have about a month left of school and have accepted that this crazy rhythm likely won't stop until the semester is over. I am overwhelmed and exhausted, but in a good way. I hope. :)

Once I am on break for the summer, I will give you updates (and photos!) of the pieces I made in my jewelry class last semester, the pieces I made this current semester, the sketches from a daily drawing exercise we did in my color on metal class, and more.

You can also look forward to a big, reflective post at some point in May. This is Austin to Africa, Brasil to the Bay post number 994, and I'm on the home stretch to 1,000.

What does one do to commemorate one's 1,000th blog post?

I'm trying to think of other non-essential things in life of which I've done 1,000. Journal entries, back when I used to write in blank books. I have at least 10 volumes full of writing and no idea how many pages that amounts to, really. I'd say more than 1,000 easily.

I don't think I'm near the point of having done 1,000 pieces of any kind of art. Something to look forward to, I suppose.

La Vida Expatica #7: Stuff Expat Aid Workers Like

I imagine some of you may have already come across this snarky gem of a site. The postings are hilarious and so dead-on, definitely worth checking out if you are working or have worked in international development.

No Shortcuts. None At All.

That's perhaps the most profound lesson I've received from being a jewelry/metal arts student. There are no shortcuts. You must put in the serious time, be meticulous, measure twice (or more) and cut once, sketch, design, hammer, file, solder and polish until your fingers are ready to fall off and your mental state is questionable at best.

When you are tempted to shortcut, thinking that something is "good enough" and you'll just go with it and make it work, you end up creating dozens of hours of extra work for yourself. Such a different mindset from all of the other university experience I've had, where I could always procrastinate and then cram at the verylastminute for an exam, knowing that I had the writing and presentation skills to pull off almost anything and get a really good grade.

This is such a different world. :)

Right now I'm technically on spring break, but rather than going on vacation or lounging at home, I'm holed up in the studio 9+ hours per day. I have a giant project due the day we get back from break, and if I don't put in the time there's no way I will be finished.

My hands are insanely sore, but all this work kind of feels good. Hopefully I'll have been successful in my time management and my project will be finished in time for class on Monday.

Big Love

Rico's brother recently visited us here at Casa Cali. We had a fantastic time together, and thought we'd take a commemorative photo on his last night. I was doing homework, and gato preto (Pria) just couldn't resist being part of the action. He hopped right up on my sketchbook just as we staged the photo and hit the self-timer on the camera.

Postcard Mobile Tutorial

For those of you who've requested a tutorial for the postcard mobile or expressed interested in making something similar yourselves, hopefully this little guide will help.

What you need:

- multiple postcards (I used 54, but you can work with any number, really)
- scissors- strong glue (I used tacky glue. Hot glue should work super well.)
- medium-heavy copper craft wire or steel binding wire (I used 18 gauge steel wire)
- wire coat hanger (alternately you could use a piece of steel music wire)
- push pin or very tiny hole punch

- pencil or pen

- wire cutters

- needle-nose pliers

The first step is to gather a bunch of similarly-sized postcards (I imagine you could also use photos, greeting cards or any other colorful, standard-sized paper media as well). How many postcards should you use? Totally up to you.

I used 54 in my mobile, partly because our project assignment was to make 50 sculptures, partly because I wanted my mobile to be pretty big. I ended up making 6 columns with 9 "flowers" in each; the finished mobile is about as tall as I am (5ft 6in).

The next step is to cut out the flower/butterfly shapes. I did all of mine freehand, because I like the slightly irregular look, but you could easily use a template and cut all of your shapes out exactly the same. You will be making 8 petals: 4 long ones and 4 baby ones. You will also have two center circles: one for the front, and one slightly smaller for the back.

Here's how you'll do the cuts. The black lines are for the big petals, the blue lines are for the small petals, and the pink circles are for the centers. Sorry this is wonky. :)

To do the cuts, start by finding the center point of the postcard. It doesn't have to be exact. To make the large petals, you want to cut in towards the center from a spot about 1/2" on either side of one of the postcard's corners. Basically the postcard's corners will become the ends of your big petals. Taper in as you cut towards the middle of the postcard so that you have nice, sharp points instead of the fat, wobbly ones in my illustration.

The baby petals and the two circles you can cut from your scraps. The small petals don't all have to be the same size. The center circles can be irregular as well. Try to make them about the size of a quarter, or about 1" diameter. One circle will be for the front, one for the back.

Figure out how you want your flower to be arranged - which petals where, etc. Or you can just glue the petals wily-nily and get a surprise at the end.

Now it's time to glue. Pick which circle you want to be on the front, and flip it over so the white part is up. Cover this side with a good layer of glue. Then place the 4 large petals, white-side-up as well, on top of the circle so that the skinny ends of the petals touch each other. You want them to be arranged like the cardinal points on a compass: North, South, East and West.

Next put the baby petals (also flipped over) in the remaining spaces on the circle. You're essentially assembling a compass rose shape. Once you have all the petals placed, cover the white side of the other circle with glue. Press it on top of the first circle and the petal points, like you're making a sandwich. You should see the back side of all your petals (white) and a colorful circle in the middle.

Make sure everything is nicely glued together. You may want to put a weight on top to help all the components stick together. Once the glue is set, flip over your flower and check out the amazing pattern that has formed.

Repeat. :)

Once you've made all of your flowers, it's time to arrange them in a way that's pleasing to you. Decide how many hanging columns you want, and how many flowers will go in each one. I did 6 columns with 9 flowers each, and arranged everything according to a color gradient.

Once you have everything laid out - ideally in a neat column/grid format - it's time to start assembling. Use a thumbtack or tiny hole punch to put a hole near the tip of each of the four large petals. Each flower will be joined to the next from two petals. (If you want your flowers to connect from one point only (i.e. oriented like a plus sign instead of an 'x'), that would work too.)

Now take the copper wire (or steel binding wire) and start coiling it around the pen or pencil (you'll get the best results with a totally smooth pen/pencil, not one that has facets or angles). Make a bunch of coils, and try to get them really tight together. Once you have filled up a couple of inches with coiled wire, wiggle the coiled section off the pen/pencil. Start cutting the coils apart so that you are creating jump rings (you can google any tutorial for making wire jump rings and get a much better explanation, with pictures). The process is really easy, it's just hard to describe.

Make as many jump rings as you need to join your flowers together. Open one ring using your needle-nose pliers, thread it through a petal, and join it to the petal of another flower. Repeat for the other petals. Join all of your flowers together in this manner. The photo below shows how the flowers should be linked.

Once you have all your flowers linked with the wire rings, it's time to create the hoop from which they will hang. I used an old coat hanger, but you could also use steel music wire. The key is to have strong, relatively thick steel wire that will hold its shape. Create a circle that will accommodate the number of flower columns you'll hang. My circle was roughly 1 foot in diameter. Bend the wire to create the circle, making sure to overlap the ends so you can wrap them together with a bit of the same copper/binding wire you used to make the rings.

Connect the rings from the top row of flowers to the hoop you've just created. Voilà! You should now have a complete postcard flower mobile. :) I hung mine from the ceiling using a bit of fishing line attached to the coat hanger hoop.

Sorry this tutorial isn't the best, but it was made after-the-fact and I don't have the original sculpture to take reference photos from. I'm happy to report it now lives in the home of my friend M. who recently had a baby boy and is the best recipient of a mobile I can imagine.

Questions? Feel free to contact me.

Weekend on a Tuesday

I frequently lose track of what day it is (as in unsure whether it's Wednesday or Saturday, not the actual date).

Does this ever happen to you?

At least once a week I do a mix-up. Most recently I thought it was Tuesday when it was really Monday. And today (the *real* Tuesday) feels like a Saturday. You'd think that being in school with a regular class schedule would help, but alas the trend that started back in Moz when Rico and I were self-employed and working from home has only worsened. I think it's the fact that I keep funnier hours than ever, what with all the studio time I have to put in these days. I often work straight through weekends, only to have a random afternoon off mid-week that becomes relax-and-have-a-cocktail time.

Even worse than mixing up the days of the week? About a month ago, when school started, I mixed up what semester it was! Our teacher handed out the syllabus and, in front of the entire class, I helpfully let him know that all the dates were wrong. I saw a page full of "February" and "March" and for some crazy reason thought it was the previous semester, as if we were in the Fall and our professor had accidentally grabbed the Spring syllabus. Needless to say I was pretty embarrassed, and my classmates all looked at me like I'd gone insane.

Lack of sleep and unpredictable hours...they do a body good.

Spring Early, Early Spring

The Bay Area is known for its mild, Mediterranean climate but what we're experiencing right now weather-wise is uncommonly warm even for these parts. Spring has fully sprung, several weeks early it seems, and as I look out the window I see daffodils in bloom, our plum tree covered with soft pink blossoms, and the neighbor's camellia studded with dark pink flowers. It's sunny, easily 70 degrees. Such a treat, although supposedly the weather is going to turn back to "normal" tomorrow and we'll get cooler temperatures and a bit of rain. We need it, really, but I will miss the sun and warmth. I am much happier with this kind of weather.

I thought about the phrase 'spring early' as I wrote the title to this post. That's really the philosophy I'm trying to embody this semester. Spring early. Don't put things off. Get things done today instead of constantly leaving them for tomorrow, or the next day. I've certainly gotten better about procrastinating, but it's akin to torture to have a day as gorgeous as what we're experiencing today and a to-do list a mile long that involves either being in the studio or in front of a computer. The urge to put tasks off until tomorrow is nearly impossible to resist. I've given in, in fact, and have decided not to go to the studio today so that I can enjoy a bit more time outside. Instead I'll write a paper today, prepare a presentation, work in my sketchbook. In theory, things I can do with my computer or sketchbook on my lap while sitting on the deck in the sun.

Tomorrow I'll spend all day in the studio. Feeling slightly stressed because I've procrastinated and left my jewelry project for the lastpossibleminute (I have to turn in a finished chasing and repoussé sample Monday afternoon). But still, a worthwhile tradeoff to enjoy a glorious day of early spring.

Owen Jones - Examples of Chinese Ornament

Aren't these Chinese patterns from the 1860's just fantastic? I love the colors and the delicate intricacy of the images. I found these on The Textile Blog, which is like a virtual candy store for those of us who love textiles, lace, carpets, wallpaper, design and more.

Love Goes Beyond Borders Adoption Fundraiser

Lately my life has been on a faster, crazier, more sleep-deprived track than usual - but I'm happy to report it's for a fantastic cause. I've been working in collaboration with a friend I went to high school and college with, Ashlee Othick Andrews, who is expanding her family through adoption. Ashlee and her husband live in Calgary (Canada) and have two gorgeous children of their own, but they believe strongly in adoption and have decided to welcome an 18-month-old boy from Uganda into their family. Between traveling to Uganda and the fees associated with the adoption, they are looking at a significant financial hurdle.

Ashlee and I began talking a few months ago about doing a jewelry fundraiser to help offset these expenses and make their adoption a reality. I've since been hard at work designing a Uganda-themed jewelry collection, producing sample pieces, taking photographs of everything, writing descriptions, and brainstorming how to get the most support possible for the fundraiser. In short, Ashlee and I have pulled off the design, production and marketing for a jewelry line! Not an easy feat, especially with the craziness of school, but it's been an amazing experience and I'm really proud of the collection.

It's been especially inspiring to work with the gorgeous handmade paper beads I sourced for the collection. Women artisans in Uganda make these beads by cutting strips from magazines and rolling them up until a bead is formed. They then coat the outside of the bead with a clear varnish to make them stronger and water-resistant. The colors and patterns in these paper beads are unbelievable, some of the most amazing materials I've ever worked with. I sourced the beads from two nonprofit organizations, Paper to Pearls and Outreach Uganda (both out of Colorado of all places!) who send their proceeds back to the women in Uganda who made the beads.

Ashlee has set up an online shop at Etsy where we're listing the fundraiser jewelry. There are limited quantities available, and some pieces one-of-a-kind. We're taking orders through Tuesday, February 15th, then I'll do all the production and have everything shipped out by March 10th. All shop proceeds go directly to the Andrews' family adoption fund.

Please stop by the Love Goes Beyond Borders shop on Etsy, if nothing else to have a look and admire all the fantastically colorful pieces in the collection. If you are able to support Ashlee and her family in bringing home their new son, it would mean a great deal to them and to me as well. Thank you all in advance!

You can read more about the Andrews' adoption saga on their blog.

The Postcard Mobile

Here's the finished result of the project I told you about here. My favorite part was organizing the postcard flowers into a color gradient that flowed both horizontally and vertically. I'm exhausted (not enough sleep last night) but satisfied with the end result, and my critique went quite well in class today.

Now to figure out what to do with this thing...

I Want This Dress

I am seriously coveting this dress. It's the Two to Tango by Nanette Lepore. The cut, color and pattern are just about perfect in my book. Sigh...